Kris Carr's Blog

Change. It’s the most popular topic on the Internet this week. Some folks love resolutions; some rally against them. Some call them intentions, rituals, goals or promises. I tend to call them resolutions ‘cause I like metrics and sweeping. When you sweep you can see your accomplishment instantly.

I generally reflect on my year (the good, bad, ugly and grace-filled) throughout the month of December; then I write my resolutions and tuck them away to review the following New Year’s Eve. Of course, I loved reading your resolutions on Facebook and twitter this week. Thanks for sharing!

Some years I post my resolutions on my vision board to inspire me to stay on track. Perhaps I’ll break them into categories like health, biz, art and mental clean-up. If I’m in a Virgo-esque (anal) phase, I’ll assign a resolution to each month. For example, January: Forgive that relative who hurt you to the bone. February: Clean the attic. March: Heal cellulite. April: Solve the exploding chronic disease crisis. May: Get comprehensive blood work done and for God's sake, take your supplements. June: Know God. July: Learn Spanish. And so on.

Let’s just say that allotting a timeline to change has never worked for me. Scheduled growth mostly ends in failure and scotch. Why? Because I’m an artist at my core. I struggle, snuggle, protest, pound fists, open arms, break, yell, hide and fly. That’s how I expand. How do you wrangle that!? You don’t.

So as I sit and ponder 2012, I’ll share my 2011 with you: what worked, what didn’t and my hopes for 2012. But before I do, here are my personal tips for transformative follow-through.

Take inventory. Get a clear picture of where I am before planning where I’m going.

Review my bandwidth. How much room do I have in 2012? Don’t pack my life with goals ‘til I’m emotionally constipated and physically exhausted. Sure I want to stretch my wings and land on the moon in heels. But I want to do it without casualties and consequences.

What’s the emotional thread I want to experience in 2012? What feeling do I want to permeate through the pores of the New Year? Compassion? Unconditional love? The shift is the honey.

Be specific. “I want to save the world” won’t cut it. What are the activities that will help me make the world a better place? Hint to all interested in that one: GO VEG!

What’s non-negotiable? What feelings or activities must change or I’ll lose my mind? And how can I hold myself accountable? Writing this blog post is a great start! Putting it out there makes it real. When we keep our goals private it’s easy to conk out.

Make time for the magic hour muse. I’m always surprised by how much I accomplish personally and professionally when I give myself time to star gaze. Time to stroll and play without structure. Ideas come. Revelations reveal themselves. Ah ha’s take my breath away. Mindlessly flipping through Vanity Fair by the fire can ignite a revolution. You never know where the muse lives. That’s why it’s a muse. Make space for it.
2011 Review (and a lot of gratitude)

I turned 40 (and got glasses!)
"Crazy Sexy Diet" hit the New York Times Bestseller list! (Thank you, dear readers!)
Bought a beat-up old farm (my dream).
Started renovating the beat up old farm (total chaos and dust!)
Business housekeeping: Hired, fired, dealt with the bones of the Crazy Sexy biz (painful, scary, responsible).
Found a new home for my writing (AKA – a new publisher).
OWN aired my film a few times (thank you Oprah!)
Had oceans of fun shooting The Gayle King Show and The Revolution.
Learned to deal with public criticism better (though it still sucks).
Said “no” more.
Omega-a-go-go: Adored teaching at the Living with Cancer weekend & was blown away by the Crazy Sexy Self-Care workshop with my co-pilots Nick Ortner & Elena Brower.
Beautiful new friends came into my life (Tara Stiles: You’re one of them.)
Had two majestic soul coven weekends with my trusted unicorns, Marie & Danielle.
Started a mastermind/visionary group of 15+ Crazy Sexy Women who support and nurture the fire and brilliance in each other (truly juicy & quenching!)
Great CT scans! Graduated to every 1.5 years (my beauty marks are behaving quite nicely – thank you beauty marks! I have too much work and life and love to do for y'all to get in the way. Appreciate you keeping it real.)
Dealt with other (non-cancer/non-baby) health issues. Ahhh, more lessons. Raged at first. Now I’m finding the gems.
Worked on ancient resentment and allowed myself to miss someone I vowed not to miss.
Fell deeper for my husband & dog.
Fell in and out of love with P90x and would like to rekindle the flame in 2012.
Made yoga my church.
Started writing again …

2012 (Here I come!) …

London. I must visit you.
Find a new spiritual teacher (I need to deepen the well.)
Spend more time with my family.
Skype with my sister more.
Sex rocks. Have more of it.
Forgive a layer deeper. And then deeper than that (even if I don’t want to).
Stop saying sorry so much (I’m not sorry; I’m just uncomfortable.)
To preggers or not to preggers? Decide. (Good grief!)
Tap more (EFT) with Nick Ortner (my brother from another mother who loves me no matter how sticky my personal gunk gets). He helps me clean up old, stale emotional garbage like no other.
Go to the theater.
See art. Make art. Use my new camera (thank you, Santa husband!)
Rescue more horses.
Hire more peeps to help me run CSL.
Be a better manager.
Deliver a phenomenal cookbook (Crazy Sexy Kitchen is coming in October 2012!) and help that baby soar!
Launch a few online goodies for y'all :)

OK. That’s good. Did I overcommit? Only time will tell. And as for the overall feeling I want to experience in 2012: that whatever I do is enough. I want to cruise through the year on a continual exhale. No matter what it brings or how life changes.

How about you? Chat with me on Facebook and twitter and right here in the comments. Share one of your resolutions (intentions, goals etc) for 2012. I'd love to know.

Wishing you loads of love & magical adventures in 2012 - Happy New Year!

Peace & New Beginnings,

KC

 

Photo credit: K. Hurley

Hiya Hot Stuff,

Well, well, well, look at our brilliant bloggers rockin' the mic at TEDx! It's like a Crazy Sexy party. Grab some tea or juice, settle in and enjoy. I'm so proud! Ladies and gents, I give you the phenomenal Gabby Bernstein, Alissa Vitti, Mama Gena, Lissa Rankin, SARK and of course, my very own spectacular sister, Leslie Carr. Can you believe that her very first public speech was a TED talk? Oh, yeah! Cause that's how we roll in my family. WOOT!

Beware: You will get goosebumps. Oh and you may want to quit your job, change your life and lock and load into your greatness. I'm just saying. :)

Have a terrific weekend!

Peace & inspirational lectures,
kc

Gabrielle Bernstein
Featured in the New York Times Sunday Styles section as "a new role model," motivational speaker, life coach and author Gabrielle Bernstein is making her mark.


Alissa Vitti
Alisa Vitti, HHC, AADP (Holistic Health Counselor, American Association of Drugless Practitioners) founded Laughing Sage Wellness, now the FLO Living Center LLC, in Manhattan, ten years ago—this, after battling the frustrating health symptoms of polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) and then healing herself through food and lifestyle changes.


Mama Gena
Regena Thomashauer (Mama Gena) is a revolution: an icon, teacher, author, mother and one of a handful of pioneers on the planet researching the nature of pleasure and dedicating her life to the discipline of pleasure.


Lissa Rankin
Lissa Rankin, MD is an OB/GYN physician, author, keynote speaker, consultant to health care visionaries, professional artist, and founder of the women's health and wellness community OwningPink.com. Discouraged by the broken, patriarchal health care system, she left her medical practice in 2007 only to realize that you can quit your job, but you can't quit your calling.


SARK
SARK is a best-selling author and artist, with sixteen titles in print and well over two million books sold.


Leslie Carr
Dr. Leslie Carr is a registered clinical psychologist in private practice, where she works with adults out of her San Francisco, CA office, as well as via Skype.



Photo credit: Michelle Fetsch

Health Ambassadors,

Last week I decided to totally hijack the entire prevention movement and throw all chronic disease, shit pickles, emotional BS and dis-ease into one month of self-care awareness. We’re calling November “National Prevention Month” – for everything! I wrote about it in Friday’s newsletter, so check your inboxes and spam folders if you missed it.

In 1971 – the year I was born – President Nixon and Congress declared war on cancer. So what’s happened in the 40 years since? Not much. Today, the United States has the seventh highest cancer rate in the world. While heart disease is on a slight decline in the U.S., the cost to treat it is expected to triple by 2030. Around the globe, diabetes deaths will double between 2005-2030. By 2030, almost 23.6 million people will die from from heart disease and stroke. These are expected to remain the single leading causes of death.

Here’s the download that most of us missed: The majority of chronic diseases, including many cancers, are caused by diet, lifestyle choices, and environmental factors. Not just genetics. Actually, poor ole genetics often gets a bad rap. Enter … drumroll … epigenetics! The sexy science that teaches us that our genes are not always our destiny. We can actually have a predispostion for something and still avoid the trigger. And catch this, we can even change our DNA. Um, yeah, we’re that powerful.

What can you do to stack the odds in your favor to hopefully avoid an unwanted medical condition? Remember this very important snugget: Keep you inner eco-system as clean as possible. That’s right, you have rivers and lakes and sky on the inside. When you smoke and shout, eat dead foods and refuse to wean, finger your remote, cry on the inside, junk out on sugary crack, and slather chemicals on and around your body – you’re polluting the pristine environment that is you. If you’re a swamp on the inside, it’s time to cleanse the waters and get them moving again. Here’s how …

Eat LOTS of plants, less animals, real food, nothing fake, move your assets, dial down stress, breeeathe, don’t smoke (it will rob your beauty and your life), build a contemplative practice, love more than you hate, forgive (yourself), pray like you give a damn, take fun seriously, burn your to-do list, say no to other peoples “you-do” lists, dump stuff, make memories, poop, poop, poop, drink your holy green juice, take supplements based on what your blood work suggests ya need, pet your pet, smile like a child, live like it’s the first day of the rest of your life and it’s so delish that you can’t wait for another!

There is only one lasting cure … and it’s prevention. And it’s up to us to set an example, teach our children, and lead the way to health, spiritual wealth, and happiness through personal action. Prevention rocks!

If you're on board, then join me and spend the next 30 days focusing on self-care. Do it for yourself, do it for the broken sickcare system and do it for the next generation. This is a movement, my friends. We need numbers. We need you. Share this post with your friends. Talk about it on Facebook and twitter. Make prevention trend! Wanna? Use the hashtag #preventionrocks

And if you haven’t signed up for my newsletter yet, get on it! From here on out, I’ll be writing a lot more about my personal thoughts and reflections there.

xo

Kris

Photo credit: Peggy Dyer

I recently got an email from a fan with a deep desire to play big in her life and career. There’s only one problem, she’s terrified of the type of criticism she might receive if she really puts herself out there. “Kris, how do you navigate the good, bad and ugly?” What a fantastic question!

First and foremost, I’ve cultivated a sacred relationship with myself. I literally have my own back and am an excellent (self) bodyguard. I also believe in KC, and drum roll … I like me. Sure, meanies can sting, but I can’t be torn down easily. Good reviews, bad reviews, why hold onto either? If you believe you’re the next Jesus, then you’d better believe you’re the devil too. That’s the roller coaster ride you buy a ticket for when you choose to get caught up in others’ opinions of you. As long as what you’re putting out in the world resonates with you, feels good in your soul’s tummy, and helps folks, that’s all the validation you need. Here’s another test: Would you be proud of what you’re doing ten years from now? 20 years, etc? If so, charge on!

Over the Crazy Sexy years, I’ve experienced a bloody-wrestling match with criticism. I’m not going to lie, every once in a while I wish my life were simpler and private. But I signed up for more this time around. And more is stunning and complicated. Not everyone is open to my wellness philosophy, irreverent sass, my desire to be a smart businesswoman and my willingness to stand up for animals, people and the planet. So how can we learn to separate constructive criticism from useless finger-waging whining? On top of that, how do we build a tougher shell to fight against bullies? It’s simple: 99 percent of the time, the stabbing comment is not about you. It’s about them. The haters will hate because they are hurt and sad and mad. Your shine freaks the holy-hell fuck out of them. Capiche?

In these situations, the quicker you shake it off and march forward, the better. Send compassion, love and forgiveness to the person attacking you. Yuck!? Yeah, I know that can be a hard pill to swallow. But boy does it reframe the situation fast. Maybe they’re having a bad day or haven’t quite learned to master the fine art of communication. Whatever the case: Never let their issues bring you down. If you can be honest with yourself, it’s pretty easy to see what information is beneficial and what needs to be tossed. Can’t see things clearly? Ask a trusted friend or colleague. Here’s another way to look at harsh commentary: When you start to get a reaction from the outside world, you know that you’re pushing boundaries and challenging yourself (and others) to grow. So, rock on pioneer!

Safe ways to deal with criticism:

1. Consider the source. Is the commenter a friend or foe? Are they speaking from a place of security and openness or anger and negativity? Even if you don’t know the person, you can usually tell a lot about them from their tone. Often, destructive, snarky criticism is a projection of the insecurity and unresolved issues of the giver. These comments can be the most biting, but also the most unfounded and telling. When you march to your own beat, you’re going to piss people off because it makes them feel uneasy about their place in the world. Thought-provokers are prime targets for being misquoted and manipulated, and you can’t control that – trust me! Take a breath and objectively examine the source before crawling into a hole of self-loathing. Plus, that person is already occupying the hole. Do you really want to hang with them?

2. Practice non-attachment. Whether the response is good or bad, you will benefit from creating distance between yourself and your work. These remarks don’t define you as a person. And remember what I said a hot second ago. You can’t control how folks perceive you. If you really want to dampen your spark, go ahead and try. Seriously, it’s not possible, so just keep your side of the street clean and let go. For example, health is a hot button issue for a whole lotta folks. To keep moving ahead, I have to remind myself that I am not merely the product of my work. I am not an inspirational patient. I am not a trailblazer. I am not a glass of green juice. I am not defined by how the world perceives my work. I am Kris. No more, no less. Sure I have goals. But my work and my life are very different – even though my life is deeply embedded in my work. Make sense? If I allowed myself to be defined by these things, I would’ve stopped years ago. And remember this, just because someone says something about you, it doesn’t mean it’s true. Is one weak voice going to silence you? No way!

3. Pull out the gems. Once in a while, you’ll receive a big honking piece of fabulous feedback. This type of critique is one of the greatest gifts a person can give you. Cherish these nuggets even if they’re difficult to digest. Constructive criticism may make you feel a little uncomfortable, but it shouldn’t hurt your feelings or cut you down. Instead, it can teach you how to better serve and build your business.
A special note about the Internet: Remember that the Internet gives everyone a voice. That’s what’s so great about it. But it also makes it an emotional land mine. People who are in pain have a really easy time venting from a laptop, especially if they never have to meet you in person or be held accountable. Journalists too. No matter how lovely they may seem, they often have their own agendas that do not include your best interest in mind. If you find yourself at a place in your career where you are being interviewed, check out the writer. Does he or she have a respectful, clean tone? How intelligent is the person? Are their values aligned with yours? If not, you can say … no. Opportunities will come and go, you’ll always have them. I promise.
Bottom line: Don’t let the fear of criticism hold you back. Use the good stuff as rocket fuel, the thoughtful advice to hone your message, and throw the junk in the trash where it belongs.

Peace & encouragement,
KC
Photo credit: TeX HeX

Nutritious, whole, organic food can cost a pretty penny, especially if you’re not committed to investing time and energy into becoming a savvy shopper and proactive consumer. I’ve encountered every excuse and complaint in the book and believe me - I hear ya! Family, work and exhaustion are tough demons to tame when you’re staring at an empty dinner table, but let’s face it … Would you rather cut corners and save some money in the short term or spend more time planning, eating consciously, and shopping smart to ward off future hospital bills, prescription costs and long-term health issues? We all slip sometimes and that’s okay! But if you put forth the effort 80 to 90 percent of the time, you’re setting yourself up for increased energy, self-esteem, and happiness for you and your family on a daily basis.

I’m not saying you should run to the nearest health food store and spend your whole paycheck. But before I dive into a bevy of cash saving tips, I’ve got a news flash. This diet and lifestyle wasn’t created for sissies. We’re warriors! That means that you’re not going to see savings unless you stick with the program. It’s time to roll up your sleeves and join this burning hot revolution. Easy-peasy food that you can scarf down in two seconds flat usually equals cheap and unhealthy. Like most things in life, the good stuff takes a little more TLC. I’m not saying that you have to give up your social life, you just might have to cut back on half an hour of Facebook stalking or the latest episode of The Bachelor. A little planning and effort goes a long way.

Now for the dirt. Over the past decade, I’ve been collecting my own tricks of the thrift (I’ve always loved a good haggling), and I’ve picked up loads of cost cutting strategies from my peeps at Crazysexylife.com and my online community posse at my.crazysexylife.com. Please, for the love of unicorns everywhere, add your own killer advice in the comments section. If we keep swapping knowledge, nothing can stop us. Not even 15-dollar raw organic almond butter!



1. Buy bulk. Sure, those bins aren’t as sexy as the pretty packaging on the shelves, but they’re a hell of a lot cheaper! While you’re scooping your millet, get chummy with the grocer and clerks. Your new buddies may be willing to order certain other items in bulk for you. Costco or BJ’s is also a prime destination for large quantity, low cost items.

2. Join your local Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) group. Some may be intimidated by this option because of the commitment and quantity. You’ll usually have a variety of veggies to choose from each week and if a half share is still too much too handle, see if a friend or family member wants to go in on it with you. There’s always the trusty freezer for preserving what you can’t consume that week. Hello strawberries in December! Here are some handy websites: Local HarvestBiodynamic Farming and Gardening AssociationRodale Institute Farm LocatorWilson College DatabaseEat Well GuideNational Sustainable Agriculture Information ServiceJust Food (NYC Region).

3. Shop your local farmers markets. Take advantage of the local bounty by perusing veggie stands with a critical eye. There are usually a variety of farmers offering an array of prices, so compare prices, bargain and make friends with your favorite farmer. Be open minded about your weekly menu, too. Take advantage of the lower priced veggies and fruits by designing your meals around their deliciousness (they taste even better when they’re a bargain). Find a market near you: Farmers MarketUSDA Farmers Market DirectoryFarmer's Market OnlineLocal Harvest.

4. Budget and plan. Before we even get to the heart of this tip, make sure you aren’t famished when you walk through the entrance of the grocery store or farmers market. That’s the quickest way to derail your well-laid plans to be a smart, healthy shopping minx. Set a comfortable budget for your weekly or bi-weekly shopping excursions and then get to whipping up a list. First, examine your fridge and cupboards. What can you build on? You might start saving right away if you get into this mindset and stop building meals from scratch every time you touch a shopping cart. If planning a whole week’s worth of meals is overwhelming, bite off few days at a time. Need inspiration? Dust off your cookbooks and get creative. You’ll find a list of my go-to recipe books in this Love List.

5. Clean and organize your fridge and cupboards, then stock up on the essentials. The kitchen is no longer a prison. It’s your playground and your personal pharmacy. Would you let a carton of almond milk get moldy in your blessed new sanctuary? In order to know what you really need, your kitchen should stay relatively clean and organized. Then, get the good stuff in there and keep the fresh and perishable items at eye level. It’s easy to forget about that poor bunch of kale when it’s sitting in the back of your crisper. Once you’ve stocked your pantry with non-perishables, you’ll have the building blocks for countless meals and going to the grocery store is less likely to break the bank.

6. Learn the Dirty Dozen and Clean Fifteen: Organic can be pricey! Check out the Environmental Working Group’s lists to determine your priorities for organic purchases. They even created an iPhone app!



7. Grow indoor greens. It is exponentially more economical to grow your own food. Whether you live in a tiny Brooklyn apartment or a McMansion, there’s room for a few pots of greens. Your choices are infinite and the how-to is at your fingertips! Start greening your thumb today by reading “Urban Gardening for the Everyday Person.” You Grow Girl is also a fantastic resource. And don’t forget to join the Crazy Sexy Gardening group at my.crazysexylife.com! Want more? Check out Garden Girl TVUrban Homestead, and Four Season Farm.

8. Be flexible. I know it sounds like I’m giving you mixed messages, but if you arrive at the supermarket and there’s a big sale on bananas, snag those babies! They may not have been on your list, but you can cut them up, freeze, and pop them in your smoothies or soft serve ice cream later. This goes for most fruits and veggies and we all know that staples like quinoa or brown rice aren’t going to go bad in your pantry, so stock up when the prices are low!

9. Skip restaurants. This gets a lot easier when you’re planning meals at least a day or two ahead of time and your fridge/pantry is stocked. Let’s get real. Those restaurant bills pile up and there’s something about the low lighting and aromas coming from the kitchen that makes you forget that you don’t need a bottle of wine plus a five-course meal. I’m not saying that you should never step foot in your beloved establishment again, just try to limit your visits to a couple times a month rather than twice a week. It’s more special that way and meals at home will become a delight rather than a drag once you get into the swing of things.

10. Make your food last: When you arrive home from the market or grocery, wash and store your fruits and veggies so that they’re organized and super accessible (Debbie Meyer Green Bags extend life expectancy!). If you’re a juicing king or queen, divide your produce into individual packs that you can pull from the fridge at a moment’s notice. Smoothie lover? Pop your packs in the freezer. Finally, if you’ve slipped a little and your goodies are going south, rescue them in a delicious soup or smoothie. Your leftovers are not second-class citizens. It’s easy to shrug them off the next day for lunch or dinner, but with a little TLC, you can whip yesterday’s meal into today’s treasure. Your fridge is not a graveyard!

11. Buy used or barter: Buying a new juicer or blender may not be in your budget right now, but what about a used one? Craigslist, eBay, not to mention your friends and family, might have an affordable gently used model. Heck, your pal might be willing to barter if you’ve got something in the house that they’ve been eyeing. In the meantime, you can still juice with any old blender and strainer (cheese cloth or nut milk bags work great!). Just blend your veggies and send them through the strainer for a tall glass of green goodness.

12. Skip the bells and whistles. Do you really need that bag of raw organic cashew butter? Once in a while, go ahead and splurge, but if you are looking for somewhere to cut corners, the specialty foods are a good place to start. You could probably satisfy that craving with something reasonably priced, you might just have to use some elbow grease to make it from scratch.

Photo credit: o5com, Paul Wittal, Jeff Cushner

I am in a special club, a club that wasn’t easy to get into but is amazing to be a part of. I was a guest on the Oprah Winfrey show in October of 2007. That electrifying experience literally changed my life. But not in the ways you might think. Well sorta in the ways you might think. It definitely opens doors and adds a heaping dose of street cred and prestige to your mission when you can say, “I was on Oprah.” I still get stopped on the street by people who recognize me from my episode with the brilliant Randy Pausch – a Bodhisattva in life and in death.

Oprah brought me into millions of living rooms. She introduced me to Dr. Oz and together we introduced the world to green drinks! Folks who never would have heard about a woman living and thriving with a stage 4 cancer met me that day. They watched as I talked about how great I feel since changing the way I was living (eating, drinking and thinking). And guess what? They ALL emailed me. Well, not all but a heck of a lot. Some of you reading this today may have joined the Crazy Sexy revolution because of that powerful episode …

OK, now let me dish some behind the scenes backstory. It wasn’t easy booking that spot; let me tell you. Oprah’s producers are the best in television. They’re tough, smart and they mean business. They also protect the great mother like a pack of media savvy wolves. First I had to prove that I had cancer. Um, a doctor’s note took care of that! It didn’t matter that my film, Crazy Sexy Cancer had aired on TLC. They needed to hear from Harvard. I guess after the James Frey debacle, producer folk stopped taking chances. Next came background checks (no, I’ve never been arrested, but it’s on my bucket list) and a slew of interviews with me. I must’ve had over a dozen calls with the producer who FINALLY booked me. By the time I got the green light, there was literally no stone left unturned.

But nothing prepared me for the big day. I didn’t meet Oprah 'til it was time to get my ass on set, about 7 minutes before the cameras rolled. The studio audience that seemed so small from the comfort of my living room was huge! Funny digression: Brian was backstage and when it was all systems go, leave the green room, hit the stage and rock … he suddenly had to pee. Um, nope. Oprah was ready. You can hold it buddy. We both entered from backstage, but he was told to take a seat in the front row. Well in classic BF form he strutted out and leaped over a pair of legs in tights. Those legs in tights were Oprah’s! I thought we’d get tossed, but he just got a look from the crew and I sauntered on (in clothes given to me by my friend and mentor, Donna Karan). Thank you, Donna!

OK, so back to the big moment, well what I can remember of it. Oprah was reading her cue cards (specs on me and her questions) when she stopped and introduced herself. “Hi, I’m Oprah.” I wanted to say “NO DUH! HOLY SHIT! I CAN’T BELIEVE I AM MEETING YOU! I LOVE YOU! YOU’RE MY IDOL!” But instead I said, “Hi Oprah, I’m Kris. Thanks so much for having me on your show.”

Then we flew. Time flew. Space flew. Spirit flew …

In between segments, we talked about my perfume (aromatherapy). Oprah had actually never heard of patchouli! I think she must have been very busy in the 1960s. Doubt she was a flower child. And then came the moment I will never forget. “You are a crazy sexy teacher”… next, an unconditional mother love hug, like the kind that you want to melt into, the safe and protected kind. And then the show was over. P.S. Her big diamond and gold earrings were absolutely fabulous. I think they kept me rooted as I really wanted to leave my body several times that day. I mean, come on, it’s OPRAH!

Watching her final show last week brought tears to my eyes: “We’re all called. Everybody has a calling, and your real job in life is to figure out what that is and get about the business of doing it.” – Oprah

Well, Oprah, ever since I was diagnosed with cancer, that’s what I’ve been doing, and for the past 8 years I’ve been teaching others how to do the same. I knew I’d meet you. I knew we’d talk. In fact I still have the journal entry from 2003 that says, “Oprah, save a seat for me, I’m coming.” Thanks for saving that seat. And I hope to sit with you again one day. This time we’ll talk about my new passion … prevention. My calling is simple. In this lifetime, I will personally take a big pHat bite out of chronic dis-ease. I’m not leaving till I do. :)

Peace and legends,

KC

P.S. Take this one soul nugget from my journey to Oprah: Believe in your message, your magic, your shine. What are the Oprah opportunities in your life? Don’t block them. Being scared is natural. Shutting down your Goddess-given gifts is not. Be bold. Be brilliant. Show the world whatcha got.

Click here for video.

Dream Builders,

As I mentioned in my last newsletter, we began demolition on our new (yet very old) farm! That's right, we bought a little Carr/Fassett family compound with three buildings (OK four buildings, but one collapsed!) on 16 acres in lovely Woodstock. This gem has been neglected for a very long time and needs lots and lots of Crazy Sexy Love. Brian and I don't know much about green building/restoring, but boy are we learning fast! In the process of tearing down walls to see what we're dealing with, we discovered there's actually a small house trapped inside the main house. Wha? The ole gal was originally built in the 1800s (ghosts! boo!), then the 1980s came along (a wacky time for fashion and architecture) and gave her a very bad makeover. Someone literally boxed her in and built weirdness around her. Here’s a little vid of us tearing down the walls. Crash. Smash. Boom. It was very liberating! Sometimes to create something new you’ve got to clear out the old. I love freeing diamonds ...

Peace & crowbars,
KC

Congratulations! You’ve taken the first steps toward living a healthy lifestyle or maybe you’re already a wellness warrior vet. In any event, you’ve grabbed the unicorn reigns of your present and future, and for that I want to give you a virtual hallelujah! Yet, sometimes making healthy choices can be tough – not only on a personal level, but on a social one. So how do we deal with unsupportive friends, family, co-workers and strangers? Here are some of my personal tips; but I know you have a slew of suggestions too; so share ’em in the comments, love!

Step 1: Understand their motivation.
It’s easy to feel angry and frustrated when you’re bombarded with odd looks and questions like “Where do you get your protein?” or “Aren’t you worried about osteoporosis and nutrient deficiency?” To approach these questions and concerns with a clear mind, it’s important to know where they’re coming from. Perhaps your mother only knows about animal-based sources of protein and calcium, and she’s genuinely worried that you’re going to damage your health. Your sister might fear that you’ll never enjoy another night of bonding over movies and vanilla milkshakes, which has always been her most treasured moments with you. Maybe your best friend is addicted to McDonald’s and facing an uphill battle with her weight and cholesterol. She might be defensive about her own diet and taking out her insecurity and ignorance on you. The people you’re closest to might be wondering if they’ll have to change too. Mostly, a negative reaction stems from fear of change and a lack of education. Once you understand the motivation behind their reaction to your diet and lifestyle, you can build a positive strategy for communication. If your audience is open and ready to receive information and new experiences then get ready to unleash your hot wisdom, wit, love and compassion. Remember, judgment sucks. No matter what side of it you’re on.

Step 2: Be prepared.
You can’t be a teacher without going to school yourself! When you’re dealing with a skeptic who responds to facts, have some handy research and websites to lean on. If they’re a bookworm, suggest that they read a couple chapters from books like “The China Study,” “Crazy Sexy Diet,” “Becoming Vegan” or any of Neal Barnard’s many books. (Here are a bunch more reading recommendations.) Sometimes only a well-crafted film can bring on an “a-ha” moment. Check out these mind-opening flicks: “Food Matters,” Simply Raw,” “Forks Over Knives” and “Food, Inc.” If you want to feel confident when put on the spot, make sure you can answer common questions about the plant-based diet. Check out The Vegetarian Resource Group’s website for lists that cite vegan/vegetarian sources of calcium, protein, iron and other nutrients, so that you’re not at a loss for words when asked how you survive without the moo juice. While you’re at it, you may want to ask a few of your own questions. Point out the benefits of checking the ingredient lists on packaged foods, and ask your critics if they’re aware of how preservatives and things like high fructose sugar affect their health. Ask them if they want more energy and a better nights rest? Certainly Crazy Sexy Diet can help with that – cellulite too (um, but be gentle with the cellulite thing. You may offend. Asking your Aunt Ruth if she wants to lose her jiggly ass fat is probably not an effective go veg strategy!) Don’t overwhelm them, but a few friendly inquiries about their own choices might help them understand why you’ve chosen to eat more whole, fresh, plant-based foods.



Step 3: Be strategic.
Dealing with unsupportive people comes with the territory when we become “Prevention is HOT” cheerleaders. In the health trenches, communication and education are part of our mission, and we have to be willing to take some knocks. If you want to be a visionary, you can’t play it safe or small; but you can play it smart!

Before responding to a question or concern, take a deep breath and flash your bright smile. Let your answer come from that space, rather than a negative or defensive place. This small effort can change your entire interaction for the better. Secondly, believe in yourself, tootsie! You’ve done your homework and you walk the walk, so there’s no reason to think that you don’t know your stuff. You are very smart. Feel it, believe it. Early in my journey, I was faced with moments of brain-freezing panic while at conferences with a bunch of white coats, talking to hundreds of people about their health. Suddenly, I wanted to crawl under the table! In these situations, I have to be my own biggest supporter and trust that my knowledge, research and experience will carry me through. It’s all at my fingertips when I take a breath and trust. If you do that, you can’t go wrong.

During the conversation be a listener. It’s a two-way street and your companion deserves the same patience, love and understanding that you expect. If you think they’ll be open to it, use humor! Laughter, especially if it’s naughty, is a fantastic strategy. Trust me. J These interactions don’t have to be a frickin’ drag and, if you can get a few chuckles out of them, you might be able to open their mind and heart a little more. The entire experience will seem less serious, annoying and intimidating so that both of you can chat more freely. Also, share your personal triumphs. No one can argue with the renewed energy, clear skin, better sex life (ooh la la), weight loss or lower cholesterol you know you possess as a result of your clean and green diet and lifestyle! Pique their curiosity by sharing how Crazy Sexy healthy and happy you are.

Finally, don’t waste your energy on people who are not in a place to receive information or respect your personal choices. Plant-biased vampires and toxic people are not worth your precious time, so send them off with a smile (or a bite) before they can zap your zing. Recently, I coached a gal who had reunited with a college pal who was still clinging to their long ago days of debauchery. She wanted the old Sally back and accused her of losing herself. Unfortunately, she couldn’t see the joy and fulfillment Sassy Sally had found in her life after she let go of burning (and boozing) the candle at both ends. Instead of being happy for her, she picked apart her diet and lifestyle over dinner. Sally was exhausted. Her responses were met with blank stares and their visit left her feeling frustrated and unsettled. Rather than spending hours dissecting Sally’s approach to eating and living, she could have identified that the conversation was going nowhere fast and used a trusty, holstered response:

“I appreciate all of your questions, and I’d be happy to email you some resources later so that you can do some of your own research.

“I totally understand that this lifestyle isn’t your thing. Can we just leave it at that and have a good time?

“I’d love to just relax and hear about what you’ve been up to! If you’re still interested in learning about my diet, I’d be happy to lend you some books. If not, let’s agree to disagree.”



Step 4: Be proactive.
Now that you’re flying high on green juice, you may want to find fellow enthusiasts! It’s so much more fun when you’re swapping tips and sharing positive experiences with people who are in the same boat. There are tons of places online and probably in your community to hook up with these radical radishes. Check out Meetup.com, My Crazy Sexy Life, my Facebook FanPage, your local health store and veg-friendly restaurants, vegan and vegetarian festivals, or join a local vegetarian association.


One of the best ways to educate others is by being you! Host a party and pack the table with your favorite vegan and raw goodies. Bring your juicer or blender with you when you visit friends and family, and treat them to a glass of green goodness. Going to a potluck? Knock their socks off with your best dish. If you are a creative whiz in the kitchen and a master of veg-substitutions, your pals will be wowed by your vegan chocolate birthday cake and they’ll realize that this lifestyle is not about deprivation. Grandma’s butter cookies don’t need to be trashed at the next holiday gathering, but maybe you’ll start your own tradition by bringing a delicious vegan cookie that makes mouths water. Why not bring the recipe too? Holidays, parties, and family dinners are prime locations for strutting your new skills in the kitchen. So get cooking, dehydrating, juicing and blending! Healthy, nourishing, delectable food is love and education in one.

OK, your turn! How do you cope, share, educate, listen and grow with the people in your life who might not be up to speed yet with your diet and lifestyle? Share your knowledge and personal experiences!

Photo credit: cayooo, SweetOnVeg, thegreenganster

Watch the video here.

Soul Sparklers,

Yesterday we closed on our new heavenly haven in Woodstock. It’s a beautiful old farmhouse just waiting for some love. Plenty of room for animals, people and veggies! I’ll be diving deep into renovating, learning how to garden (um, help!). Basically, I’m looking forward to to (sassy/sexy) home-making and bringing more balance into my life. And one of the ways I can do that is by putting into practice what I’ve learned from biz maven and Crazy Sexy Life contributor Marie Forleo. She has a white hot online program called Rich, Happy & Hot B-School that shows you the secrets to providing incredible value online while creating space to live and love your life! Seriously, she breaks everything down into easy actionable steps and lays out the path for you to follow your bliss and create an income stream to support you and your dreams! Open enrollment began yesterday. Check it out here. Any other B-School alumni out there? Share your experience in the comments below! I took the course last year and loved it so much that I'm doing it again. My very old farmhouse needs it.

Peace & pencils,

KC

Watch video here http://crazysexylife.com/2011/ask-kris-wheatgrass-gluten/.

Happy Earth Day!

Hey unicorn planet hugger. Wanna great earth friendly tip? Go vegan! Even if only for a day. Save the animals, the oxygen, the water, oil, soil, etc. FYI: there’s more protein per calorie in broccoli that there is in that T-bone. I’m just saying! Ok, so today’s video is my first “Ask Kris” segment. yeah! You ask questions, I answer said questions. And if you have a question for my next segment, lay it on me here tootsie! If I don’t know the answer, you can bet your sweet buns I’m only an email or phone call away from a fantabulous expert who does! Hunting knowledge is my personal pass time/obsession. In fact, knowledge is the only things we should be hunting.

Hope ya enjoy.

Peace and questions,

KC