Jonathan Heatt's Blog: Teaching Snapping Turtles - Posts Tagged "zuckerberg"
Facebook Bumper Sticker Suckers
"God Loves Me, But Not You" and other nuggets of wisdom like "my kid beat up your honor roll student" are the stickers attached to billy-hopper bumpers on every highway. Fish decals signifying sanctimony, and vanity plates exuding desperation are other Trapper Keeper stickers that mongoloids take pride in.
Trite Individuality was something to stick on your car. But not anymore...those days are over. Who needs bumper stickers when there's Facebook? Every day is a bumper sticker of ignorance to propagate online. Everyone is a star of their own sordid reality show. Bowel movements and lice scratching...However mundane -- a day of domestic misery is something to be Liked.
In order to maintain a semblance of sanity I had to take a break from Facebook. A psycho threatened to kill me for cracking a harmless joke. If this is what famous people go through then I never want to be famous.
I was under the impression that getting online was like being human: having a sense of humor.
Nope.
The crazy dude wrote on my wall "I will kill you." Then emailed me the profound statement "I might kill you." Make up your mind already. You will, or you might? Schizos are so wishy-washy.
Only on the internet can a passive aggressive lunatic have over 2000 friends and threaten to kill you after cracking a joke about said passive aggression.
The internet is a conduit to crazies. Our era of Social Networking is devoid of humor, and breeds a mentally-defective mob of John Hinckley Juniors who now have 24/7 access to Everything. The phrase "I might kill you" is casually tossed around like "hello". The new normal is decidedly abnormal. Existence has been narrowed down to log-in passwords and 'Likes'. Thanks, but no thanks. I have to leave the Zuckerberg island every so often.
Facebook is an all-day buffet for sturgeons and other assorted bottom feeders. A couple thousand barnacles attached to the zombies floating through the current of abnormality...and they all like it.
So a break is necessary. But I won't let the bastards win. I'll thin out my "friends" list so it more accurately reflects reality. Then get back on Facebook sporadically and promote my projects.
And the flaws I observe in Facebook I will remedy in the website I create. A website that will benefit Humanity. "Don't complain, do something" is my phrase. Even though passive aggressive punks like to post that same thing on Facebook after me. So my new phrase is: "I wrote a book, bitch."
Trite Individuality was something to stick on your car. But not anymore...those days are over. Who needs bumper stickers when there's Facebook? Every day is a bumper sticker of ignorance to propagate online. Everyone is a star of their own sordid reality show. Bowel movements and lice scratching...However mundane -- a day of domestic misery is something to be Liked.
In order to maintain a semblance of sanity I had to take a break from Facebook. A psycho threatened to kill me for cracking a harmless joke. If this is what famous people go through then I never want to be famous.
I was under the impression that getting online was like being human: having a sense of humor.
Nope.
The crazy dude wrote on my wall "I will kill you." Then emailed me the profound statement "I might kill you." Make up your mind already. You will, or you might? Schizos are so wishy-washy.
Only on the internet can a passive aggressive lunatic have over 2000 friends and threaten to kill you after cracking a joke about said passive aggression.
The internet is a conduit to crazies. Our era of Social Networking is devoid of humor, and breeds a mentally-defective mob of John Hinckley Juniors who now have 24/7 access to Everything. The phrase "I might kill you" is casually tossed around like "hello". The new normal is decidedly abnormal. Existence has been narrowed down to log-in passwords and 'Likes'. Thanks, but no thanks. I have to leave the Zuckerberg island every so often.
Facebook is an all-day buffet for sturgeons and other assorted bottom feeders. A couple thousand barnacles attached to the zombies floating through the current of abnormality...and they all like it.
So a break is necessary. But I won't let the bastards win. I'll thin out my "friends" list so it more accurately reflects reality. Then get back on Facebook sporadically and promote my projects.
And the flaws I observe in Facebook I will remedy in the website I create. A website that will benefit Humanity. "Don't complain, do something" is my phrase. Even though passive aggressive punks like to post that same thing on Facebook after me. So my new phrase is: "I wrote a book, bitch."
Teaching Snapping Turtles
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