Mark Anderson Smith's Blog: My 100 Goals

This was the latest of my audible "reads" and the most useful one so far.

So often we focus on what went wrong, but (just like Simon Sinek in Start With Why) these guys (there are four authors to this book) focus on what goes right in important, potentially life changing conversations.

I suspect I've read a copy of this book before, quite a bit was familiar to me, but I'm glad I chose to listen to it again. The advice they give is essential if you want to improve your relationships, prevent or repair fall outs.

They give a set of tools and methods to guide us in how to recognise when things are going sideways in a conversation, uncover the underlying reasons for what is said and for behaviour, and steer a conversation back to a place where everyone feels safe to continue discussing.

The ultimate aim is to find a mutually agreeable solution. Not necessarily a compromise, though that might be the ideal in some cases, but a solution where everyone wins.

I am going to benefit from working through this book again. I've been listening in the car and that has been great for getting an overview, but this is one book I want to study and learn from.

The narrator - Joseph Grenny - was the perfect choice. Easy to listen to.

I highly recommend Crucial Conversations!

The 10x Rule: The Only Difference Between Success and Failure

I set out this year to listen to at least ten motivational books through Audible. Roughly one a month. There were a few books that I'd had my eye on for a while and I started looking for more and kept coming across this title from Grant Cardone: The 10X Rule.

At the end of January, when my next audible credit dropped (along with my bank balance...) Audible also offered me a two for one deal and I ended up choosing The 10X Rule along with Start With Why by Simon Sinek (See my review here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...).

They are very different books!

Cardone's message is as simple as set your goals ten times higher than you think you need to and put ten times the effort in to achieve those goals. It's a message that I find appealing as I've been pursuing goals for the last fifteen years and have pushed myself to achieve more and aim for more.

Ten times more though...? My first thoughts while listening were: is it really possible to put ten times the amount of work in? If you are already working at max output, perhaps not. But don't dismiss Cardone's thesis even if you know you are already doing all you can. What if there are ways you can simplify what you are doing? What if you can find efficiencies that will allow you to save time, effort or energy? What if you can work with others to do more work than you could each do alone? Just a few possibilities that might make it possible for you to put in two times or three or four times the effort or even more.

I've proven to myself time and again that if I keep thinking, keep trying, keep challenging myself, I can do more. So maybe it is possible I could put ten times the effort in.

As for setting goals ten times higher than what you think you need, why not? That's not going to hurt anyone. Cardone deals with a common myth that you should not over-reach with goals and I agree with him, at least within the bounds of reality... If your goal was to lift 100Kg, I don't think you should be aiming to lift a ton! But Cardone is mainly dealing with business goals: sales, profit, revenue, customers, clients...

I gave the book four stars, knocking a point off as I found Cardone a bit shouty... Personal preference, you might be energised by him.

If you want to achieve more, this book might just be for you!

Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action

I listened to Start With Why on Audible and found it a fascinating if somewhat frustrating listen. The frustration was mainly around the examples used which became repetitive when for the third and what seemed like the fourth time Simon Sinek talks about the Wright brothers or Steve Jobs and Apple. That being said, the author did add value as he dug deeper into the history of groups and organisations in his quest to understand why some succeed.

His premise is fascinating, that we are all motivated by why, by purpose, by shared belief, and that people don't buy Apple because they believe what Apple sells, they buy Apple because they recognise that Apple believes the same as they do. Apple succeeds because its message is clear and so those people who already believe that message want to be associated with Apple as it shows to the world this is what they believe.

It is quite a revolutionary insight that for the past few weeks has had me examining my own decisions and seeing parallels. A DVD collection that says a lot about the type of person I am, or aspire to be, a red guitar that more than hints at my desire to be leading a crowd in a rock anthem, my choice of coffee over tea...

I've listened to the book twice now and am sure I'll return to it again, to absorb all I can. I highly recommend the book if you are interested in understanding how to connect with people, how to sell or market, how to draw people to a cause. The author did an excellent job reading the audible version and the only reason I've dropped the book a star was my frustration over the repetitions. Maybe I'm being too harsh, what do you think?

I would like to be successful. What successful means is something I interpret in different ways at different times.

As a kid I always love the idea of finding buried treasure and consumed adventure stories. I'm still attracted to that possibility, but rarely play lotteries as I'm put off by the idea of gambling. If I played and won, it might be like finding buried treasure, but I've heard too many stories of how such a win can destroy otherwise happy lives to imagine it would be a completely postive experience.

Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People is definitely a book about being successful, but the emphasis is on social success. Understanding people to help them get what they want while at the same time increasing ones chances of getting what I want.

There are aspects of the book that I'm uncomfortable with. Mainly where it seems to suggest, or could be interpreted to suggest ways of manipulating people. Yet I understand that it should also be possible to apply the techniques recommended in ways that respect others and allow others to make free decisions.

Perhaps no decision we make is ever free... If so, then understanding the concepts Dale Carnegie proposes would at least help us to understand how and why we arrive at decisions we make.

I rewatched A Beautiful Mind over the Christmas holidays and am reminded of the concept of game theory illustrated. Where we work together, we can all win. This seems to be one of the underlying messages of How to Win Friends and Influence People.

I would recommend that anyone who wishes to improve themselves and see improvements in their relationships read this book.

I listened to the Audible version.