Ed Halliday's Blog - Posts Tagged "humour"

I have succumbed! Since deciding that I should write something far more serious (a task which has begun), I have been bombarded with requests for sequels of both 'the almost perfect plot' and also 'The Grinning Dog'.

Ok, I give in! More dark humour is coming.

'The Almost Perfect Sequel' is under way and the serious stuff will be temporarily put on hold. Any other requests please do let me know.

Best wishes,
Ed Halliday

Hello again.
I feel compelled to write this today following a very strange event! This unprecedented happening consisted of my being left speechless following a remark made to me, a phenomenon hitherto unknown. A close family member of mine had recently read The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish and thought it rather odd that I should believe there was not only my version of the afterlife, but also such things as Grim Reapers, especially ones wearing pink tracksuits! I know my fans well enough to be certain that they all understand the concept of satire and black humour, but just in case any more of my bloodline are unsure, let me assure everyone that I am a writer of fiction, make believe, and therefore this book should definitely not to be taken as gospel! (or any kind of religious doctrine!)
Best wishes, Ed Halliday
author of The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, the almost perfect plot, The Grinning Dog and Burnt Toast and Bent Noses

As some of you may know, I happen to live in France. This is for numerous reasons that include wine, garlic butter and much better weather than we get in England! The one thing the French are not renowned for, however, is comedy. I was discussing this fact with my local 'Boulanger' (Pascale the baker)who informed me that the French in fact love the English sense of humour, and surely I was a fan of 'Mottay peeten'. I assured him I had heard of no such comedian but he pursued this line of discussion with much zeal,eventually ending in a French adaptation of the dead parrot sketch from none other than Monty Python! I have to say that this is one of my favourite Python sketches but it took on a whole new dimension when performed in French amongst a queue of old ladies waiting for their daily Baguette! In short, the French seem to be gaining a sense of humour which I have to say seems to be diminishing in the English speaking parts of the world. Clever comedy seems to be being replaced by foul mouthed sexually explicit ranting, television in particular seems to be the worst culprit. Thank goodness the likes of the dead parrot sketch are still being remembered somewhere in the world, even if it is in the most unexpected of places! I'm going to go and buy my daily Baguette now, I wonder if I can persuade Pascale to do the Ministry of Silly Walks?
Cheers,
Ed Halliday
Author of The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog ,Burnt Toast and Bent Noses and the almost perfect plot

Hi All.
I was recently confronted with someone determined to undermine my credibility as an English speaking personage, and to this end they asked me, out of the blue, to define irony! Faced with the tricky task of trying to remain calmly composed whilst trying to fabricate a response, I came up with the following:-
Irony is a description of a type of event or happening which under normal circumstances would affect the subject in either a detrimental or beneficial manner, but under the current unusual circumstances has little or no effect, resulting in a comedic moment.
It's not perfect, but it worked. I would, however, love to hear if anyone has a better potted definition or can improve on mine so I can memorise it for next time.
The ironic thing is that the person who originally asked me for the definition didn't even understand the response, so still has no idea what it means!
Cheers,
Ed Halliday
Author of Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, The Almost Perfect Plot, The expected demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog.

It's hot!
In fact, it's very hot!
Very very hot indeed.
Everything is sticky and unpleasant (no smut please, I am British!) and the bits that aren't sticky are just plain coated in sweat, lovely! In fact my finger tips are practically sliding off the keys as I type, so they could actually do with being sticky, but apart from that it's just highly unpleasant. And to think I spent a good part of the winter saying that I couldn't wait for the summer! how foolish do I look now that I have my wish as I sit here melting in over 40 oC ! (that's 104 for those of you over the other side of the Atlantic).
This over heating problem is slowing down progress on the writing front, as I have to stop every thirteen seconds for a cold beer, but the next book, which is titled "Pigs in Paradise", will be out shortly (as soon as my editor emerges from the refrigerator where she has been hiding for some time). For those who wish to be first in the queue, if you 'follow this author' on either Goodreads or Amazon.com (you have to go to the author page) you will get notified automatically, or of course watch this space.
I'm off to dunk my entire self into ice water now, so that I can do a bit more work!
Cheers, Ed Halliday

Author of: the almost perfect plot, The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog, Burnt Toast and Bent Noses

Hello everyone.
What a fabulous week! A new reader of mine (That makes at least 2 now) has introduced me to a great new author I was not previously aware of. Actually, that's not true. I was aware of his work but not his name, although mostly through movies. I would never have realised that films like '3:10 to Yuma' had originally been penned by the same person that wrote 'Get Shorty' and the book on which Tarantino's 'Jackie Brown' was based, were it not for a gentleman leaving me not only a 5* review for Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, but also commenting that it reminded him of the work of Elmore Leonard. So a wholehearted 'thank you' for both. Also, seeing as I'm in blogging mode, my next book, Pigs in Paradise, is now written and being edited as we speak. I will let you all know when it is due to appear, probably early August.
Cheers, Ed Halliday
Author of:- Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, The Almost Perfect Plot, The expected demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog

So, the new book is finished!
Pigs in Paradise is being edited and made pretty before it is inflicted on the general public, which renders me a bit redundant for the minute!
What shall I do to occupy my time? Movies? Lounging in the sun? Enjoy a good bottle of wine? Sounds good, but it will hardly occupy me for any length of time (although I shall definitely give that last one a go anyway!).

I know what, I could write a book!

More mayhem and murder anyone? Coming right up!

Cheers, Ed Halliday
Author of : The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, the almost perfect plot, Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, The Grinning Dog

Hello everyone!
I am very pleased to announce that my latest book, pigs in paradise, is now available in paperback and on Kindle.
As usual, it is a feast of mayhem and murder, and I hope you all enjoy it.
Cheers,
Ed Halliday

Author of The Grinning Dog, The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, the almost perfect plot, Burnt Toast and Bent Noses

Hello.
I thought I ought to ask this question of the great public as I am unsure of the answer! Does anyone know when this phenomenon might occur? Will my children ever grow up? Having just had the eldest (who is 30! How the hell did that happen? Have I been in a time warp?) and his younger brother stay for a week I was astounded to find that it was no different to when they were teenagers. Staying in bed until lunch, dirty laundry everywhere, encrusted dinner plates under the beds! I'm sure when I was their age I had grown up a bit more than they have, although maybe my parents would disagree. Or maybe they have turned out the same way I did only now I am a grouchy old man approaching 50, so it feels as though they haven't progressed beyond teenagedom? The other reason of course could be that they don't have children of their own yet. Maybe your children only stop being children when they turn you into a grandparent and have children of their own? (Great, something else to look forward to! Grandad Ed!). Any comments to support or deny this theory would be greatly appreciated.
Cheers, Ed Halliday

Author of:- The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog, Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, the almost perfect plot, pigs in paradise

Hello again and apologies for the recent lack of posts!
I guess I should try and make an excuse, but as an employer of mine used to say, 'excuses are like bum holes, everyone has one and none of them are very pretty', so I shan't inflict one of those on you!
I know this isn't author related, but I felt compelled to write today as I thought I should extend a heartfelt 'thank you' to the people of Portland in Oregon. The USA has always been a bit of a mystery to me and I have never had the opportunity to visit much of it. I have been to New York (great place) but that is about it, until recently that is.
Due to family reasons I have just spent 8 days in Portland, and what an amazing surprise it turned out to be!
As many of you probably realise, I reside in France, which makes food a pretty important part of life! Portland is the first place I have found where good food is more revered than it is in France. Not a single fast food joint, everything home made, home cured bacon, home brewed beer etc etc! The quality and pride the locals take in their produce is unsurpassed!
Not only that but everyone was extremely welcoming, the city was clean, not too crowded and at no point did we ever feel remotely worried about being in 'the wrong part of town'. And to top it all, they have the biggest independent book store in the world! Heaven.
If you get the chance, go visit Portland, and once again a big 'thank you' to all the Portlandians who welcomed us.
Cheers,
Ed Halliday
Author of: The Expected Demise of Bernard Fish, The Grinning Dog, Burnt Toast and Bent Noses, the almost perfect plot, pigs in paradise