A close friend finished my book and called me with notes he took. We started talking about questions he had and while going over it with him... I broke down and began to freak out a bit.

He calmed me down but the rush of what happened to me freaked me out. I've been very calm releasing my book and being honest to a fault with it but the experiences came rushing in like a freight train and I'm just dealing with combat shock right now.

I mean really, who in this day and age says they met the Devil, visited by God and has been to Hell.

I was hoping that writing the book would exorcise me of the pain, fear and knowledge that I learned from the other side. It's one thing to believe and another thing to know.

I'm a total mess today. Just want to hide but the wife is coming home from work and I have to put on a happy face and cook and pretend everything is alright.