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My dear friend and colleague, Ali Anani, shared a post on 5/27/20 titled, “Is Truth Difficult to Find?” As usual, his post garnered many comments. Most of those that I saw revolved around how to find the truth among all the false information that’s available.

I thought I would share how each person’s mind automatically sorts out their version of the “truth” as an additional resource for anyone who might be interested. The following is an excerpt from my book, The 90-Second Mind Manager with that explanation:

DELETION

We select only some of the available information and leave out a great deal.

How you have ever written an email and, after reviewing it, decided to hit the “Delete” button on all or part of it? How many times have you started to verbally communicate and, after considering what you were about to say, decided to “delete” part or all of what you were about to say? Consciously, and mostly unconsciously, we filter many thousands of pieces of information in a very short space of time. We selectively delete words in our communication and leave others to fill in the gaps. We often omit nouns and verbs and that will often lead to misunderstandings. (In my book are some examples of deletion we use with others, with ourselves, and suggestions on how to correct them)

DISTORTION

Giving a simplified version that distorts the meaning and fits our belief system.

Some examples of Distortion are:

Mind reading – Imputing thoughts of another person

Statement: “I know he hates me”

Questions to ask: How do you know he hates you?

The answer to that might be: “Because he doesn’t call me anymore.”

Questions to ask: Why does it follow that he hates you because he doesn’t call you anymore?

Lost Performatives – This is when a value judgment is made without saying who made it

Statement: “Sensible people agree that children should take all their vaccinations”

Questions to ask: How do you know they are sensible? How do you know children should take all their vaccinations?

Nominalization – This occurs when a verb is made into a noun, which makes it appear like a thing rather than an action.

“Statement: We need more communication”

Questions to ask: How would you know if you had it? What does good communication sound like? How does it make you feel?

Cause and Effect – Using of such words as: because, if, then, makes, and causes.

Statement: “Your comments made me upset.”

Questions to ask: How did you make yourself feel upset by what I said? How did you decide to give me power over you to be able to make you upset?

Complex Equivalence – The use of words such as: means, therefore, implies.

Two statements are joined or linked and giving them the same meaning.

Statement: “Her text was so brief; she must be upset with me.”

Questions to ask: How does writing a short text indicates she is upset with you? Aren’t texts supposed to be short?

Presuppositions – They presuppose that something is true in order to understand the sentence.

Statement: “Have you stopped beating your dog yet?”

Questions to ask: What makes you think I have a dog? What makes you think I beat my dog at all?

GENERALIZATION

Categorize the world in terms of how things are like or different from other things.

When we generalize everything as positive, it is possible to accept poison with the potion. When we generalize everything as negative, we miss out on great opportunities. This takes away our ability to distinguish details and differences. Here are some examples of generalizations:

Modal Operators of Necessity:

Should, shouldn’t, must, mustn’t, need to, have to, supposed to, and many other words and phrases like them cause the mind to feel that there are no options and immediately create stressful sensations in the body.

A corrective to Model Operators of Necessity is to ask questions. If a person says, I should always be on time for appointments.” You can ask, “What happens if you aren’t?”

Model Operators of Possibility:

Can, will, may would, could (Opens up possibilities and options)

Model Operators of Impossibility:

Can’t, won’t, couldn’t (These set the frame of not having possibility or options) A great question to yourself or someone else here is, “What stops you?”

Universal Qualifiers:

Always, never, no one, everyone, all, none

A corrective for Universal Qualifiers is asking a question, like, “There has never in your entire life when ___ didn’t happen?” Or, “There’s not a person on the face of the earth has ever ____?”

Cognitive Qualifiers:

Cognitive qualifiers direct your mind to think of aspects of an experience that are specified by the kind of qualifier used. A cognitive qualifier prepares the mind to respond in a specified way to whatever words follow. Here are examples: Interestingly, curiously, surprisingly, understandably, sadly, happily, regrettably, and unfortunately.

Imagine saying this sentence to yourself, “I am sitting at the desk”. Now add “happily” before the sentence and notice the picture that comes to mind. Now add “sadly” before the sentence and observe how the picture in your mind that you create is different. Whether you use Cognitive Qualifiers with conscious intent or unconsciously, it doesn’t matter. Whether you use Cognitive Qualifiers with your self-talk or with other people, it doesn’t matter. In any of those instances, you are creating expectation in the psyche to feel a certain way about what is said next. As a 90-Second Mind Manager, you’ll want to use them consciously and with good intent. (End of excerpt)

So, you can see how the human mind creates an environment for each person’s version of the “truth” to be maintained and strengthened based on their belief system. In fact, every belief is based on the assumption that what is believed is the “truth”.

However, these beliefs are not permanent.  They can be intentionally transformed through a facilitated process that I use to help my clients overcome beliefs that are no longer useful for them.  Beyond that, it helps them enjoy life to the full, finding happiness, fulfillment, success, and satisfaction!

Please feel free to comment, like and share this article. And, if you would like to interact one-on-one, please contact me at ed@trans-think.com or 972.900.9207.