New Review of No More Neckties
From D. Donovan, Senior Reviewer, Midwest Book Review.
Readers of essays about psychiatry, aging, and life changes will find Dr. Loren A. Olson's No More Neckties a fine blend of medical and personal memoir.
It compliments the prior book, Finally Out, with a focus on Olson's evolving life, from family secrets and forming relationships within the gay community to sexual and social revelations that influenced the course of his life.
The chapter titles that segregate these experiences into subjects are particularly evocative ("Can I Pray Away the Gay" and "I Didn't Expect Sex to Be This Difficult," among others), setting the stage for discussions of gay lifestyles and the move from attempting a heterosexual life to entering the world of gay relationships in midlife: "I left my marriage at the beginning of the HIV/AIDS crisis. I knew few gay people. I didn’t know how to begin dating as a middle-aged gay man. I worried about how my daughters would introduce me to their prospective boyfriends. Once again, I had magnified the negative and minimized the positives. Whitney and Krista had plenty of boyfriends, but not one ever made my sexual orientation an issue."
It should be cautioned that No More Neckties is sexually explicit. Readers who look for more circumspect descriptions should look elsewhere; but those who appreciate candid surveys of sexual and emotional pathways will find the mix of physical and emotional connections satisfyingly straightforward.
This frank approach isn't limited to graphic sexual encounters, but also is represented in psychological self-assessments which are equally hard-hitting: "I never intended to break my vow to their mother or to walk away from my children. Yet I have never second-guessed my decision to come out."
No More Neckties's special perspective in following a family man's transition from a heterosexual marriage to accepting his feelings for men will gain it attention from any reader who has been (or knows somebody) 'in the closet' and who is interested in the process of coming out and growing into one's true identity.
By reflecting on past, present, and future relationship possibilities, Dr. Olson injects positive reflections into his memoir that will serve as inspirations and road maps to others who are making (or have made) such transitions: "But all of us have evolved into much more complicated individuals than we anticipated. We have expanded our world to include a new definition of family."
Libraries strong in memoirs about the gay experience and the process of making the leap to a different definition of family and connection will find No More Neckties unerringly frank and attractive to patrons.
Readers of essays about psychiatry, aging, and life changes will find Dr. Loren A. Olson's No More Neckties a fine blend of medical and personal memoir.
It compliments the prior book, Finally Out, with a focus on Olson's evolving life, from family secrets and forming relationships within the gay community to sexual and social revelations that influenced the course of his life.
The chapter titles that segregate these experiences into subjects are particularly evocative ("Can I Pray Away the Gay" and "I Didn't Expect Sex to Be This Difficult," among others), setting the stage for discussions of gay lifestyles and the move from attempting a heterosexual life to entering the world of gay relationships in midlife: "I left my marriage at the beginning of the HIV/AIDS crisis. I knew few gay people. I didn’t know how to begin dating as a middle-aged gay man. I worried about how my daughters would introduce me to their prospective boyfriends. Once again, I had magnified the negative and minimized the positives. Whitney and Krista had plenty of boyfriends, but not one ever made my sexual orientation an issue."
It should be cautioned that No More Neckties is sexually explicit. Readers who look for more circumspect descriptions should look elsewhere; but those who appreciate candid surveys of sexual and emotional pathways will find the mix of physical and emotional connections satisfyingly straightforward.
This frank approach isn't limited to graphic sexual encounters, but also is represented in psychological self-assessments which are equally hard-hitting: "I never intended to break my vow to their mother or to walk away from my children. Yet I have never second-guessed my decision to come out."
No More Neckties's special perspective in following a family man's transition from a heterosexual marriage to accepting his feelings for men will gain it attention from any reader who has been (or knows somebody) 'in the closet' and who is interested in the process of coming out and growing into one's true identity.
By reflecting on past, present, and future relationship possibilities, Dr. Olson injects positive reflections into his memoir that will serve as inspirations and road maps to others who are making (or have made) such transitions: "But all of us have evolved into much more complicated individuals than we anticipated. We have expanded our world to include a new definition of family."
Libraries strong in memoirs about the gay experience and the process of making the leap to a different definition of family and connection will find No More Neckties unerringly frank and attractive to patrons.
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