For Shadows within the Fog, I spent six months developing a series of scenes for another location. With most of them, it was possible to adapt the ideas to a new location. But as I worked through them, a new ending began to take shape, and these two passages were cut.

To say I followed my stars would be cliché. But it’s true. I was on my way to see a quartet play in the open air. It was supposed to be an evening with Philipp Glass. The venue was outside of town on a large converted farm whose owners placed the land in a a private trust and made it available for classical and folk concerts. On this particular night, it was a chilly evening in November and the sky clear and in the darkness along the dimly lit trail, Orion’s belt illuminated the night sky.

I stopped for a second while enroute and looked up. The Orion constellation was special to me. I remember stopping with my father on the way back from a Saturday evening mass on some deserted country road and looking up into sky and listening as he pointed out the different constellations in the sky. When it came to Orion, he paused and said:

“There: those three stars. They are Orion’s belt.”

“Who is Orion?” I asked.

“He was a great hunter of the night.”

“Are there any animals in the night for us to find?”

“Look into sky. Can you connect the stars to find his prey?”

I looked and pointed my finger at the different stars trying to imagine a constellation for Orion to hunt. I must have looked for maybe five minutes but I found nothing. He watched me with an expression of amusement.

“Dad, I can’t find his prey.” I said.

My father bent down and looked me in the eye. “Someday, you will desire something so deeply that your soul will hurt. The pain of want will grip you intensely. If you look into night and see Orion’s belt, he might lead you to your destination.”

I thought of this as I looked up at the sky that night. I wondered for a second what he meant when he said that. I couldn’t imagine anything on my heart that left me desperately yearning for anything. Maybe he said that to add mystery to the moment. Who knows.

After pausing and reflecting for a second, I continued on the concert venue. I could see the glare of tiki torches in a thick grove of pine trees in the distance. The venue was a small stone amphitheater dug into the ground. It could fit maybe two or three hundred people.

At the bottom, It had a stone and brick stage with grand piano on the far right end of the stage. (End of passage one)

In this next scene, an early version of the Diana character joins the story. She has some of the same core characteristics from the final version of the character but I picture her differenly here. I liked this passage a lot but I could not make it work with the plot line I chose to go with.

… A friend of mine, Diana, was there waiting for me. She had texted me a few minutes earlier asking where I was.

It was nothing romantic — just a relationship. I was not ready for romance. I knew Diana from college, We had been friends for a long time and ours was a comfortable friendship... without benefits.

From the parking lot at the edge of the property, I had to walk 15 minutes along a path through hilly pastures of wheat and spelt. At the edge of the pastures stood a mixed forest. The path meandered through the forest for another two or three hundred yards. As the path entered into the forest, I could see the glare of tiki torches illuminating the trees in the distance. The venue was new and only recently completed. It was a stone amphitheater built into the ground. It could fit maybe two or three hundred people.

At the bottom sat a stone and brick stage with grand piano on the far-right end of the stage. The rest of the ensemble

That night an ensemble played a selection of Glass’s dance pieces. With the acoustics of the amphitheater, the music became overpowering. It shook my body and visually affected other members of the audience. The music played for more an hour and held on all of us. I could see people with their eyes closed gently swaying back and forth with the music. The final piece was a solo piano piece titled Mad Rush. The pianist, a thin silver-haired man sat alone at the piano in the now darkened corner of the stage and began playing. He began playing that became more dramatic as piece progressed. His dramatic play between the two sections of the piece with an understated opening was subdued before exploding in all-out drama in the rapid passages of the music. The intensity of the emotion was overwhelming.

I looked around the audience at the different people listening to the music. It was there that I saw her sitting alone across from me on the other side of the theater, maybe 80 feet away. How had I missed her? In the dancing light of the torches, she seemed to radiate with the music. She had black hair and resembled Katie. She sat with her elbows on her knees holding her head in deep concentration as the music pulsed through the amphitheater and into the surrounding forest. She wore a black cardigan covering a white blouse and dark grey pants and the sight of her left me stunned. I sat enthralled by the music watching that woman in the audience and I thought of Katie. Were her eyes open? Did she see me? I don’t know. But for the entirety of the piece, I was occupied by my vision of her.

The piece ended and the audience applauded. Two more encores were played followed by another round of applause and then the audience stood to leave. I was ready. I had my eyes on her. She stood, looked around and quickly weaved through the departing crowd and exited into the surrounding forest. I looked at Diana. Excusing myself, I took off in the same direction. There was a crowd and the passages were blocked. It took me a few minutes to break free. I ran through the forest and back into the field but I saw nothing except for those stars. There was nobody as far as I could see. It seemed that she had disappeared. By the time I reached the pathway through the field, I had lost her. A gentle murmur of voices arose from the people coming from behind. I looked up and saw the Orion constellation glimmering in the cloudless sky and I wondered. Could it have been Katie?

Diana caught up with me. “What the hell happened? You took off as if you were possessed by something.” she asked.

“I don’t know. I saw someone.” I answered.

“You saw someone? Who?” She asked.

“I swear to God. It looked like Katie.” I answered.

“Did you notice her at the end of concert? Around the middle of one of the final pieces, I noticed you were somewhere else. You gazed in some distant direction. I even whispered something to you but you didn’t answer. I thought it was the music but when the concert ended, you fled.” She said.

“Yea, I know. I really felt like I knew that woman.” I said.

“But you lost her?” She asked.

“Was that meant metaphorically?” I asked.

“No, I meant that you actually lost sight of that woman.” She retorted.

“I mean she must have taken off to clear that distance.” I said.

“Weird. Well, you didn’t catch her. Let’s get a drink.” She suggested.

“And you really didn’t see her?” I said.

“I have not seen pictures of Katie for a long time. I never met her and don’t have enough of an idea about what she looks like.” She answered.

“Alright then, Let’s just get a drink and chill for a bit.” I said.

We walked back to the bar at the venue and bought two beers and talked about the concert and Katie. Diana seemed oddly mum about it. She was never one to miss chance at giving her opinion. But tonight, she said nothing. (End of passage two)

The real pity is I like these passages enough to share. They just never made it into the novel.