The following is a manuscript of my speech for the 2024 Toastmasters International Speech Contest. Unfortunately, I failed to make it as far as I had hoped. However, I can say that I poured a tremendous amount of energy and emotion into this speech. Therefore, it is not content I simply want to lose in a file on my computer.

My goal was to craft a speech about depression…that was not depressing to hear. As I considered this end, I proposed to my wife Kara what it might be like to craft a speech in the style of Doctor Seuss. She loved the idea, and this was the result.

While I am still immensely disappointed that I was not good enough to progress further in the competition, I believe the following message to be one that I hope can be used in some way. So…today I share it with you.

The speech title is simply: BE THERE

How do you broach a subject that’s hard to address?

How do you approach a challenging talk that might elicit distress? 

When a topic is complex and deep – And you don’t want to put a crowd to sleep

When it’s something you hesitate to mention – because others may question your intentions

Friends, I do not pretend to know – what is always the best way to go

And I realize today a risk I take – leaving an unknown aftermath in my wake.

I fully know and I fully see that this may change how you view me. 

But sometimes what’s hard must be addressed. Not because it is easy, but because it is best.

So I hope that adding some rhythm and rhyme…it might make this a more pleasant time. 

Because topics that might make us first wince a bit can be easier when framed with whimsy and wit.

So Toastmasters, guests, and Contest Chair too, I bring a hard talk from me straight to you.

What I will describe within this session…is what it’s like to live with what you’ve heard called “depression”.

While depression can be hard to fully explain, much of it comes down to the work of the brain.

You see, circumstance, trauma, and other factors could cause the brain not to work as it should.

Yet even if life is nice and clean depression might show up as part of your genes.

For example, my brain tells me all sorts of mean things. And though I fight back it consistently stings.

My brain is a jerk…It’s weird but it’s true. And it’s awkward to confess this to others like you. 

It’s hard to admit every day is a fight. From when I wake up, to when I lay down at night.

It’s living each moment while I hear toxic soundtracks from between my ears. 

How I should be smarter and richer and thinner. How I’m the lone loser amidst all the winners. 

How I should be more successful and faster. All of that potential but all this disaster. 

How I stink at my job. I’m a terrible spouse. How I suck as a dad. How I’m weak as a mouse.

How I’m a failure, a loser, a waste…how it would be better if I were erased. 

It’s hopeless, it’s pointless…just go back to bed – maybe it would be better if I were just…

These are the things Depression will say and proclaim that I deserve to feel this way.

That I have no friends there are none who care –  I deserve to feel as though I am where

There’s no way out…no hope no end – and so my job is to pretend. 

Because no one wants to be around a person who is often feeling down. 

And so so often people like me…just hide what others don’t want to see. 

We put on smile and we pretend…that everything’s peachy on our end.

But on the inside…no matter how strong…the fight just feels like it’s gone on too long.

I don’t say this for pity – far be it from me…but to offer some insight so that you might be

More aware of those around you who might – be fighting their own invisible fight. 

And I want to point out that statistics say, 21 million Americans live this way. 

These are your neighbors, your co-workers too who put on a mask while in front of you.

Your family, your friends your rabbi your pastors, your barista, your barber, your fellow toastmasters. 

So today I want to empower you with a simple idea of what to do. 

About how you can support someone who might be fighting their own invisible fight.

My recommendation for how to offer care comes down to two words…simply this: “BE THERE”

To be there in presence or even text can say – more than the “right words” might ever convey.

Because suddenly they’re not alone – suddenly they’re not fighting on their own

Suddenly there’s proof that someone does care – all because you chose to be there.

In that moment you’re a shelter, a light – as the storm rages through their personal fight.

When your loved one cancels plans to hide because they cannot face the world outside

Be where they are with your phone or maybe a book – fully letting them off the hook…Saying “There is nothing you have to say or do – As long as I can sit here and just be with you.”

When your partner feels at a loss or trapped, please try not to get your feelings chapped.

Say, “For better or worse no matter the weather…we may go slow, but we will go together.”

I realize this doesn’t heal the past – and there is no magic cure to make this go away fast…

But it will go a long way if you just say a prayer…take a deep breath and choose to be there.

While I have this time, I want to say – to you who are fighting in a similar way

I’m proud of you for not giving in…for not letting depression win

For every time that you got out of bed – despite the dark fight going on in your head

For every time you got out the door…though really you wanted to lay on the floor. 

For every time you took care of your kids or your spouse or your dog or your great uncle Sid

I am proud of you for every day you’ve not let depression have the last say.

I’m proud of every step you’ve taken, every time you’ve not let your faith be shaken

Keep fighting friend and please, please know – I’m proud of your progress – no matter how slow.

While friends, there is so much more to say – that all must wait for another day

I hope I’ve made you a bit more keen on a fight that so often goes unseen.

And for some of you – I hope you’ll dare to simply, intentionally choose to be there.