Still plugging away at trying to make better decisions and for the most part doing a good job of it. My weight the last few mornings has been 277 or 278, which is basically back to where i’ve been the last several months. So i’m happy that in these last few weeks i’ve gotten down a bit from 282 on super bowl, but mostly just trying to get my habits back to being good. This particular weight just feels like such a plateau at this point and it’s hard because I know there really isn’t much further to go. But I also think that attitude is what’s contributing to the apathy about finishing the weight loss. I’ve always kind of lived my life in this “just good enough” kind of way. I was always a B student. I’ve always been a B level person. Good, but never excellent. I keep reminding myself that if I just perform good habits and routine that eventually the weight will start to come off again. Maybe it’s time to play with some different meal combinations and choices just to change things up? I do think my habits of eating the same things quite often probably lead my body to adapting a bit to that.

Was feeling a bit down about things yesterday. One of the big things I’ve tried to work on during this whole weight loss has been self-esteem. I do think as a whole it’s improved, but my core feeling about myself tends to be one of disappointment and rejection. Which I thought by age 43 I’d have moved past. I mean this is the only life and body I’ll ever have, so I better learn to love it. Time is ticking away lol.