( The Passive-enabling father says ) -“Don’t upset your mother.” ” You know how your mother is.” Or the worst… ” Go apologize to your mother and make things right with her.” You wonder- is it possible Dad is in the dark when it comes to mom? Is he blind to her manipulations, or is he so snowed by her that he genuinely thinks it is all okay? You can’t be sure. But it leaves you wondering if he genuinely cares. You may have felt sorry for him and saw him as a victim. Even so, you can’t reconcile the fact that, at the end of the day, your passive-enabling father will side with Mom, no matter how unreasonable or cruel she is to you (or him, for that matter). With a passive-enabling father, you wonder if anyone is truly on your side. You can’t understand why Dad doesn’t protect you. That’s what really hurts. If your mother is narcissistic, borderline, or difficult mother, life is hard enough without Dad totally flaking out and leaving you out on a limb… when it comes to dealing with her Mother. For the life of you, you can’t understand why he let’s Mom […]

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