I recently had the pleasure of joining Dr. Jessica Higgins on her Empowered Relationship Podcast to explore how the core themes of my book, The Way of the Wave: Nature’s Model for Navigating Life’s Currents, can help improve intimate relationships. Together, we unpacked the ways control impacts love bonds and how acceptance and humility can help us strengthen them.

Ocean waves, in particular, continue to model how we can flow with life rather than fight it. Relationships have their own ebbs and flows and when we stop trying to control things, we foster more ease, resilience and soulful connection in love.

Key Takeaways

When we feel disconnected or uncertain about the relationship, our instinct may be to try to fix or manage the situation. But often this tight grip pushes love further away. Letting go creates space for trust and intimacy to grow.

Acceptance is not passive. It’s an active practice of choosing to see and appreciate your partner as they are, not as you wish them to be. This shift softens resentment and opens the door to real connection.

Relationship lulls are normal and can often lead to a clearer understanding and exploration of how love can deepen and expand.

Dr. Jessica’s Relationship Action List

Embrace your partner as they truly are. Release the urge to judge or change them.If you notice yourself trying to control outcomes, pause and choose to trust the natural flow of your relationship.When you feel triggered, ask yourself: What am I really feeling or fearing underneath this reaction?Welcome quiet moments or “lulls” in your relationship—they provide opportunities for insight and deeper connection.Recognize when you’re expecting too much from your partner. Communicate your needs and remember that some things are yours to fulfill.In moments of conflict, lead with humility—own your part, apologize if needed, and invite honest conversation.Offer your full, undistracted attention to your partner. Listen to understand, not just to reply.If you find yourself pulling away, intentionally come back to repair and reopen communication as soon as you can.

 

I hope this episode offers a few gentle reminders for navigating love’s currents with more ease, care and joy. You can listen to the full episode below!

May you go with the Wave!

Danny

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