Today is the day after Charlie Kirk’s funeral. I had tears all throughout it and was amazed how many preached the Gospel. I loved it! I also loved a lot of Erika Kirk’s speech. There were four things I disagreed with her about. I will share these. We must pray for wisdom for her during this difficult time.

She told men how they should be as husbands. I didn’t like this nor think this was her place to do so. Women aren’t to teach men. We are only to teach women. It’s fine she told women to be virtuous. We absolutely should, but it seemed the list she gave to men was far longer. I wish she would have not done that. (Let me assure you, I don’t hold any of these issues with her speech against her at all! I am just sharing with you what I thought. I love her and want the very best for her.)

She said that wives shouldn’t be “servants” of their husbands. Christ said the greatest of all is the servant of all! Servant is not a bad word. If we can’t be a servant towards our husband as his help meet, who are we to be a servant for? (I agree we aren’t their slaves as she mentioned also. Slaves are bought and sold. Our husbands willingly chose us, and we chose them!)

She spoke about being the CEO of TPUSA. She needs to be home raising her children, not a CEO. If it means just a few hours while the children are napping to be on phone calls, that’s fine, but I pray it doesn’t take her away from her children. She can have highly capable godly men take her place in moving TPUSA forward. No one can take the place of her in her children’s lives. (There’s a post going around hoping she will be the first female president of the United States. I sure hope not! I never want a female president.)

The fourth one is very controversial, and many, if not most, of you will not agree with me, and that’s okay. I don’t believe she needed to forgive the man who murdered her husband.

“Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.” (Luke 17:3,4) One must repent before they can be forgiven. God doesn’t forgive us unless we repent.

“Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.” (1 Timothy 5:20)

“…forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32) Christ doesn’t forgive us unless we repent.

“Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.” (Matthew 18:15-17)

Finally, this one from a man on X:

Should I forgive someone who hasn’t asked?

What do we do if the offender has never asked for forgiveness?

There is a difference between an ATTITUDE of forgiveness and TRANSACTIONAL forgiveness.

An Attitude of Forgiveness means I pray that God would forgive the offender, just like Jesus on the cross praying, “Father, forgive them” – asking God to grant them the gift of repentance.

The Attitude of Forgiveness says, “I have released this person from their debt towards me in the court of Heaven. In the presence of God who knows my heart, I no longer hold a grudge against them; I have released them of this debt before you.”

An attitude of forgiveness primes your heart and makes you ready to give transactional forgiveness when sought out.

This is VERY different than walking up to them and saying “I forgive you” unprompted. That’s unbiblical. It is unbiblical to express forgiveness to someone who hasn’t sought it.

This will cheapen and short-circuit the cycle of repentance and reconciliation. This cycle cannot happen if the offender doesn’t repent.

Does God forgive us this way? Just issue blanket forgiveness without repentance? No.

Transactional forgiveness always requires repentance.

If you cultivate an Attitude of Forgiveness, then when the offending party comes to you and asks you “Will you please forgive me,” you will already have the attitude of forgiveness. And you’ll be glad to forgive.

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