Meow: A Novel and Doug: A DougDoug Story are bestsellers not because they out-explain their competitors but because they out-entrain them. By orchestrating semantic satiation to collapse lexical meaning into sonic texture, by engineering page-level periodicities that the sensorimotor system happily locks to, and by exploiting biomusical rewards for synchronized vocal behavior, they convert reading into a bodily, social, and platform-native practice.