Seriously now…
Once I wrote an Erotica short story, that came close to inducing convulsions in one member of a critiquing group. Since she’s known for her professional editorial skills, I thought she might be able to whip my grammar and punctuation into shape, enough to make it submittable.

According to her, the grammar was the least of my worries. The near-convulsions were over a sex scene that ended with the male protagonist cleaning himself with the bed sheets.“No! No! No! No!” read her note...