It’s a strange feeling when you realise something for the first time. This is especially true when what you realise is about yourself. This is especially double true when what you realise is something you have been taking for granted your whole life. This is especially triple true when you have this happen twice.

Following all this? Let’s put it another way…

Realisation 1:

I don’t look at people or places as I walk. I look down at the ground passing beneath me.

I realised this was true and that not everyone else does this, after my wife Jh said unto me for the millionth time, ‘Did you see that shirt?!’ And I replied, ‘What shirt?’

I always thought I wasn’t perceptive but actually I just spend my time looking at the footpath. Which makes me …unperceptive, but whatever.

Realisation 2:

I don’t look at people’s eyes when I speak to them, I look at their mouths.

I’ve known this for a while now because sometimes people think I am a rude freak for not ‘looking at them’ as we speak. But now I’ve realised how this affects me in other ways.

Jh always asks me to describe people she hasn’t met and wants to know their eye colour. I never know. I know that she and our two boys have brown eyes. But that’s all. I think I have blue eyes but I’ll check that. I have NO idea what colour eyes anyone in my family has. Also, I am ATROCIOUS at remembering people’s names. I think my name is David but I’ll check that. This could be because I don’t register what other people look like when I meet them. Except for their lips, anyway.

So there you go. Analyse ye, analyse ye, and perchance thee will cometh to the realisation that I haveth major issues!