Hello friends, on this auspishious Humpy Day I would like to bring you some beautiful musics. Maybe you no is knowing this about me, but I is a amazing songwriter. In fact, I is writing all of these fantabulous songs that pop tarts pop stars is always stealing from me! I has a call in to my lawyer about this travesty. In the meantime, here is just a few of the #1 hits that I has penned.

Obviously, I was very young when I wroted this song, but I stands firmly behind it as an example of my artistry. This is a rare example of one of my songs being stoled with all of the words to the chorus completely intact (just like I was at this time):




Of course, Adele has butchered my beautiful song "Reuben Has It." Just listen!



Terrible. Here is the correct lyricals:

"Reuben Has It"

I is big; I sprays my pee on the ground
I took my Chewy from you, and now you has a big frown
I likes to chew cause it feels good on my tooths
Now Reuben has it, and I never needs no excuse

Reuben has it (grrrr)
Reuben has it (grrrr)
Reuben has it (grrrr)
Reuben has it (grrrr)

Next up is a song that I was just a puppy when I wroted it. Of course, the lyricals is wrong again:




Here is the correct lyricals:
(*editor's note: People Sister actually wrote this one all by herself!)

"Reuben the Magic Dachshund"

Reuben the magic dachshund lived in a house
He liked to frolic on the farm way outside of town
He has a floppy tongue and a snaggle tooth
And likes to pee on every tree, and has a cat in his house, so back off! 

Reuben the magic dachshund lived in a house
He liked to frolic on the farm way outside of town
He has chewies and beds to keep him satisfied,
And to keep his teeth from hurting, because he only has nine of them.


Clearly, friends, I is owed many royalties from all of these hard works. If my lawyer no can work out the logisticals on this one, then I plans to go pee on their legs.