Recovering From a Bad Relationship
When you have been the "victim" of a divorce, the first thing you MUST UNDERSTAND and BEGIN BELIEVING is that YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF IT. Regardless of how badly you feel you must realize that it has happened to millions of people before you; it is happening to countless people every day; and it will continue to happen to millions of people so long as there is love, marriage, and divorce.
Although you may never have felt such pain in your life before, YOU WILL GET OVER IT. It takes time, but you will recover and find love again. It is imperative that you understand this, and believe it, even if you have to write it in big letters on your bedroom mirror, type it out on a 3 x 5 card you carry with you in your wallet, or say it aloud to yourself every hour on the hour.
You must at the same time, understand that people suffering from divorce go through certain predictable phases of thinking and acting as they begin to recover. In order to cope with the insecurity, uncertainty, and emotional damage you have suffered, you should understand that it is only natural that you go through each of these phases, and that as a result, you will again be a happy person.
Of course, all of this is much easier said/written than done, but the things you must do, and you must do them - or get started on them - immediately. You have to think about yourself - finding some sort of work with which to support yourself, and maybe your kids; writing out a plan for the management of your money; figuring out your transportation needs; and what you are going to do to fill your spare time.
What has happened to you can be likened to a cut on your hand: It hurts, and you bleed, but you wash it off, perhaps apply some medication, then a bandage and allow time as well as the healing processes of the human system to make it all well again. Therefore, it is with the dissolution of a marriage, but the bottom line is still: You must cure yourself of the hurt before you can be happy again.
As human beings, all of us have a brain. Because each of us has a brain, we all have feelings that manifest themselves emotionally in one form or another. No one is perfect, and thus, though we usually try with everything we have to handle our problems with expertise, we usually fall down at least once or twice along the way. It is important to understand one's self as a human being and to try to get a handle on our ambitions for true happiness - but if we should fall down along the way, we have to pick ourselves up and try again. This is likened to a baby learning to walk - he may take a small step or two, and then fall down, but unless he picks himself up and tries again, he will never learn to walk.
Do not be afraid of being alone! Think about your own ambitions and the kind of happiness you would like to enjoy. Remember that loneliness, boredom and unhappiness are indeed, self-induced - determine that you want to be happy and then reach for it with all you have!
Franklin Gillette
Although you may never have felt such pain in your life before, YOU WILL GET OVER IT. It takes time, but you will recover and find love again. It is imperative that you understand this, and believe it, even if you have to write it in big letters on your bedroom mirror, type it out on a 3 x 5 card you carry with you in your wallet, or say it aloud to yourself every hour on the hour.
You must at the same time, understand that people suffering from divorce go through certain predictable phases of thinking and acting as they begin to recover. In order to cope with the insecurity, uncertainty, and emotional damage you have suffered, you should understand that it is only natural that you go through each of these phases, and that as a result, you will again be a happy person.
Of course, all of this is much easier said/written than done, but the things you must do, and you must do them - or get started on them - immediately. You have to think about yourself - finding some sort of work with which to support yourself, and maybe your kids; writing out a plan for the management of your money; figuring out your transportation needs; and what you are going to do to fill your spare time.
What has happened to you can be likened to a cut on your hand: It hurts, and you bleed, but you wash it off, perhaps apply some medication, then a bandage and allow time as well as the healing processes of the human system to make it all well again. Therefore, it is with the dissolution of a marriage, but the bottom line is still: You must cure yourself of the hurt before you can be happy again.
As human beings, all of us have a brain. Because each of us has a brain, we all have feelings that manifest themselves emotionally in one form or another. No one is perfect, and thus, though we usually try with everything we have to handle our problems with expertise, we usually fall down at least once or twice along the way. It is important to understand one's self as a human being and to try to get a handle on our ambitions for true happiness - but if we should fall down along the way, we have to pick ourselves up and try again. This is likened to a baby learning to walk - he may take a small step or two, and then fall down, but unless he picks himself up and tries again, he will never learn to walk.
Do not be afraid of being alone! Think about your own ambitions and the kind of happiness you would like to enjoy. Remember that loneliness, boredom and unhappiness are indeed, self-induced - determine that you want to be happy and then reach for it with all you have!
Franklin Gillette
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