Changing Faces is a charity in the UK devoted to helping people and families who are living with conditions, marks or scars that affect their appearance. They do this in two ways: They offer support to individuals with physical differences to help them live fuller and happier lives, including work to educate doctors and educators for improving treatment and interaction. They also aim to transform public attitudes towards people with an unusual appearance, advocating in favor of equal treatment and against discrimination.

James’s book. Changing Faces was kind enough to send it to me as it’s not available in the United States.

I interpreted the name “changing faces” to mean changing attitudes about faces. But after reading founder Dr. James Partridge’s book Changing Faces, the Challenge of Facial Disfigurement, the reception and success of which inspired the inception of the charity, I realized that James meant to literally change faces, as in ending up with a different face than you started with.

Perhaps my interpretation stems from the fact that the face I currently have is pretty much what I started with. I have considered myself fortunate in that respect. Sure, I’ve had my challenges including issues with acceptance and low self-esteem, but this face is all I’ve ever known. I’ve literally had my whole life to adapt, and I feel fortunate that my parents took me out in the world, exposing it to me and me to it, so I am much less impacted by the reactions of others. If I have one regret, it’s that I’ll never know what my face would have looked like had the removal of a tumor not left it dismantled and half paralyzed.

James, on the other hand, survived a car accident at age 18 that left his face and other parts of his body severely burned. He literally woke up to a new face- one that required a lot of adjustment, especially considering he was quite a handsome young man.

Though surgery offered some improvement over the years, this is essentially the same face I’ve had all my life.

As I’ve become more connected in the facial difference community, I’ve become friends with people who have had their face altered, and usually their lives along with it. Some in an instant via some sort of accident, and some more gradual as certain types of syndromes will do. Since I haven’t had to change faces, I can only experience via their stories what it was like, having to make that adjustment after living part of your life with a “normal” face. After all, we tie our face into our identity. Some of the people who have had to deal with this unexpected alteration are adapting quite well, while others, even after years, are still having a hard time.

I can pretty much guarantee that even the most well adjusted of us all have our moments of self-pity or self-doubt when we wish this had never happened to us. But it did, so we deal with it. The alternative, to somehow not deal with it, is far worse.

Those who ridicule or pity us or who look at us and think (or say) I’m so glad I don’t look like that should keep one thing in mind: It could happen to you. In an unpredictable instant, you could be the one changing faces. And if it does, you’ll be OK because we are here to support you. “We” are individuals like myself, David Roche and Vanessa Carter; social media support groups such as the Adults with Facial Differences Networking Community and the Physical Differences Support, Discussion and Advocacy Group on Facebook; and organizations like Changing Faces in the United Kingdom, The Phoenix Society for Burn Survivors in the United States and About Face in Canada. We offer living proof that it’s possible to live a happy and productive life even if your face isn’t symmetrical or has scars or you’ve lost muscle control over part of it. You’ll still have friends- probably better quality ones- and you can still find romance.

I do believe, given the focus of the organization, that my original interpretation is completely valid. Changing faces is also about changing attitudes, within the facial difference community, the medical community, and within the broader community of fellow human beings.

View my webinar with Dr. James Partridge at http://app.webinarjam.net/register/2144/d088b19895. (Will be available as a replay after the fact.)

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