Banoffee > Banoffee's Quotes

“When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better. ”
― Mae West

“No woman gets an orgasm from shining the kitchen floor. ”
― Betty Friedan

“I was like, Am I gay? Am I straight? And I realized...I'm just slutty. Where's my parade?”
― Margaret Cho

“I desire to be with you. I miss you. I feel lonely when I can't see you. I am obsessed with you, fascinated by you, infatuated with you. I hunger for your taste, your smell, the feel of your soul touching mine.”
― Jack Llawayllynn, Indulgence

“Understand that sexuality is as wide as the sea. Understand that your morality is not law. Understand that we are you. Understand that if we decide to have sex whether safe, safer, or unsafe, it is our decision and you have no rights in our lovemaking.”
― Derek Jarman

“Self pity becomes your oxygen. But you learned to breathe it without a gasp. So, nobody even notices you're hurting.”
― Paul Monette

“If a bullet should enter my brain, let that bullet destroy every closet door.”
― Harvey Milk

“Gender preference does not define you. Your spirit defines you.”
― P.C. Cast, Awakened

“Before you echo 'Amen' in your home or place of worship, think and remember...a child is listening.”
― Mary Griffith

“I've just fallen in love with you. What is your name, and please tell me you're gay?”
― Jet Mykles, Just For You

“It takes no compromise to give people their rights...it takes no money to respect the individual. It takes no political deal to give people freedom. It takes no survey to remove repression.”
― Harvey Milk

“Straight? So is spaghetti until you heat it up”
― Jet Mykles, Squire

“I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.”
― Woody Allen

“Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.”
― Oscar Wilde

“The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.”
― George Carlin

“If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.”
― Frank Zappa

“Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.”
― Woody Allen

“It’s absolutely unfair for women to say that guys only want one thing: sex. We also want food.”
― Jarod Kintz, $3.33

“His saliva tasted like the wet dicks of ten thousand lonely truck drivers.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Tell-All

“There’s a Greek legend—no, it’s in something Plato wrote—about how true lovers are really two halves of the same person. It says that people wander around searching for their other half, and when they find him or her, they are finally whole and perfect. The thing that gets me is that the story says that originally all people were really pairs of people, joined back to back, and that some of the pairs were man and man, some woman and woman, and others man and woman. What happened was that all of these double people went to war with the gods, and the gods, to punish them, split them all in two. That’s why some lovers are heterosexual and some are homosexual, female and female, or male and male.”
― Nancy Garden, Annie on My Mind

“I felt very close to God.... My friends say that's because I was always on my knees.”
― Armistead Maupin

“I've never really addressed those rumors because I figured, 'Why defend yourself against something that is not offensive'?”
― Johnny Galecki

“THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR: 'Please stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

“I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.”
― Woody Allen

“Hate to sound sleazy,
but tease me,
I don't want it if it's that easy”
― Tupac Shakur

“Pussy is sweeter than honey and more valuable than money.”
― Mary B. Morrison

“Women fake orgasms and men fake finances.”
― Suze Orman

“For women, the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time.”
― Isabel Allende, Of Love and Shadows

“I automatically assume people won't like me, so I don't talk to them unless they approach me first. I can't become a part of a crowd because I can't get past that feeling that I don't belong.”
― Stephanie Kuehnert, Ballads of Suburbia

“Your ideas suck"

"So does my mouth. Why don't you get your dick over here and I'll demonstrate.”
― Jet Mykles, Purgatory