Manspreading Quotes

“Richard Burton by Stewart Stafford

Jester’s coxcomb to a fool’s translator?
A brothel-creeper in a neon-puked alley,
A bean-counter totalling rice grains;
Surreptitious, scrumptious attic grub.

Stand back, witness me Manspread!
Lease me your lobes while I Mansplain!
Overcome, I expire in an orchestra pit
From the fumes of acute "Toxic Masculinity."

Hear my epitaph: "Women aren't funny...
so put on the Earl Grey, love!" Coup de grâce!
Many have said where I should stick my opinion,
But I leave the worst to the collective imagination.

© 2025, Stewart Stafford. All rights reserved.”
― Stewart Stafford