Piss Quotes

“You can’t chain your heart forever, one day or another you are going to open it for someone and (s)he is going to piss inside it.”
― M.F. Moonzajer

“As her brother turned to walk away, she asked with mild exasperation, “Where are you going? Leo, you can’t leave when there’s so much to be done.”
He stopped and glanced back at her with a raised brow. “You’ve been pouring unsweetened tea down my throat for days. If you have no objection, I’d like to go out for a piss.”
She narrowed her eyes. “I can think of at least a dozen polite euphemisms you could have used.”
Leo continued on his way. “I don’t use euphemisms.”
“Or politeness,” she said, making him chuckle.”
― Lisa Kleypas, Mine Till Midnight

“   "Okay!...my three dots! have people ever reproached me for them! they've slobbered on about my three dots!...'Ah! his three dots!...Ah, his three dots!...He can't finish his sentences!' Every stupidity in the book! every one, Colonel!"
   "So?"
   "Go!pss!pss!...piss off, Colonel! and what's your opinion, Colonel?"
   "Instead of those three dots, you might just as well put in a few words, that's what I feel!"   ”
― Louis-Ferdinand Céline, Conversations with Professor Y

“Piss me off and count your toes because what's commin, AIN'T GOOD, AIN'T FUCKING GOOD!”
― Deyth Banger

“Elevators are supposed to smell like urine. That's what make the jazz playing through the overhead speakers sound more authentic.”
― Jarod Kintz, A Memoir of Memories and Memes

“If this isn’t important, I will rip your throat open and piss down your lungs.”
― James S.A. Corey, Cibola Burn

“Earlier today I had sex with a monkey and then roasted and ate it with a glass of choir boys' piss. I like to get in the mood.”
― Peter Milligan, The Discipline: The Seduction

“Trees in Afghanistan are so rare dogs queue up to take a piss...”
― Debra Quincy