Talking Cat Quotes

“From somewhere above me, there was an irritated hiss. ‘Food.’
I strained my head upwards. ‘Hi, Brutus.’
His yellow eyes stared down at me, unblinking. ‘Food, bitch.’
I sighed. ‘I’ve told you time and time again. If you call me that, I’m not going to feed you.’
‘Food.’
‘Give me a minute.’
‘Food.’
‘I’d like the chance to get a cup of tea first.’
‘Food.’
‘Piss off.’
‘Food.”
― Helen Harper, Slouch Witch

“I abandoned the plan to make millions from the spell when I realised that people would finally realise their cats are selfish little bastards who only care about themselves. There would have been mass feline abandonment if they heard what their pets really have to say.”
― Helen Harper, Slouch Witch

“Pet,’ Brutus repeated. ‘Bitch.’
‘Don’t be offended,’ I said. ‘He calls everyone that.’
I winked at Brutus”
― Helen Harper, Slouch Witch

“Is this one of those situations that involves "ethics"? 'Cause I'm a cat, you know. I've never been very good at those.”
― Phil Foglio, Agatha Heterodyne and the Voice of the Castle

“You're a cat," she said automatically.
"Your powers of perception are astounding," the cat drawled. "Although I feel obliged to point out, in the interests of ontological exactitude, that I am in fact only half cat. Personally, though, I have always considered it the better half."
"And you can talk," Alice said, working her way through the situation.
"Better and better! With brains like that, I can see how you monkeys took over the world.”
― Django Wexler, The Forbidden Library

“Don't try to boggle me, Mister Talking Cat. This is Mechanicsburg. You are by no means the strangest thing in this town.”
― Phil Foglio, Agatha Heterodyne and the Voice of the Castle

“Martellus: Talking behind my back, are you?
Krosp: Of course not! You're right here!”
― Phil Foglio

“You have great potential, Panda … use it wisely.”

Percy Panda: Chapter 1”
― Anthony Gapper, Percy Panda