Moragan Jones

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Jarod Kintz
“She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her.”
Jarod Kintz, This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

E.E. Cummings
If

"If freckles were lovely, and day was night,
And measles were nice and a lie warn't a lie,
Life would be delight,--
But things couldn't go right
For in such a sad plight
I wouldn't be I.

If earth was heaven and now was hence,
And past was present, and false was true,
There might be some sense
But I'd be in suspense
For on such a pretense
You wouldn't be you.

If fear was plucky, and globes were square,
And dirt was cleanly and tears were glee
Things would seem fair,--
Yet they'd all despair,
For if here was there
We wouldn't be we.”
E.E. Cummings

Jarod Kintz
“If sharks really can smell blood, then I’d imagine they’re all salivating over my erection right now.”
Jarod Kintz, $3.33

Jarod Kintz
“I once saw a snake having sex with a vulture, and I thought, It’s just business as usual in Washington DC.”
Jarod Kintz, The Days of Yay are Here! Wake Me Up When They're Over.

Jarod Kintz
“I wouldn’t even be the “world’s sexiest man” if the planet were populated entirely by my clones.
”
Jarod Kintz, At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it.

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“Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put bac ...more
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