Holly

“Gods, you must have been a deadly swordsman when you were younger.”
“Come again?”
“It's the only possible explanation for how you made it to a ripe old age. With a mouth such as yours, surely people have been trying to kill you since you were old enough to duel. And yet you're still here.”
“I was fair with a blade. I was better with my brain.”
“Which is why I am here, you cantankerous pustule. I don't expect you to hunt down the murderer yourself. Just look at what evidence has been gathered. See if you can pick out anything the watch might have missed. Then, when you're finished, apologize to my horse.”
― Michael McClung, The Last God

“Gaston was a short, bulky man in his late fifties who favoured tight jeans, studded belts and sleeveless T-shirts, the better to show off the tattoos on his own arms. Only the absence of a mullet or a purple Mohican saved him from a breach of the EU directive against egregious cliché embodiment.”
― Ben Aaronovitch, The October Man

“you’re dead set on creating explosions that a crematory operator would hear and would definitely be freaked out by, don’t leave unpopped popcorn in your body. Instead, try leaving a pacemaker in your body. (Note: I one-thousand-percent do not recommend doing this. I’m making a joke. See, I can make jokes too, Tim.) A pacemaker helps living people control their heartbeat, speeding up the heart if needed, slowing the heart down if needed. It’s a cute lil’ thing, the size of a small cookie, that is basically a battery, generator, and some wires implanted (through surgery) into the body. It can save your life if your heart is misfiring. But if a pacemaker is not removed from a dead body before the cremation, it can turn into a tiny bomb.”
― Caitlin Doughty, Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs? And Other Questions About Dead Bodies

“Watching amateurs at work can also inspire us to attempt the work ourselves. “I saw the Sex Pistols,” said New Order frontman Bernard Sumner. “They were terrible. . . . I wanted to get up and be terrible with them.” Raw enthusiasm is contagious.”
― Austin Kleon, Show Your Work!: 10 Ways to Share Your Creativity and Get Discovered