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Greg Gutfeld
“I've noticed, living in New York, how hard it is for many women to find Mr. Right. This is because when you look at most men living in big cities, none of them are Mr. Right. There are just way too many sexual options for them, so they feel no pressure to behave like actual gentlemen.
So, who gives them these options? Women, of course - who don't have the balls to limit these options and ask these boys to behave like men. So now that women are screwing men the way men want women to screw them, there are few men out there who would actually want to marry women after they've fucked them.”
Greg Gutfeld, The Bible of Unspeakable Truths

Christopher Moore
“Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place.”
Christopher Moore

Joseph  Delaney
“Now it's the dark's turn to be afraid.”
Joseph Delaney, Curse of the Bane

Christopher Moore
“That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm.”
Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal

Christopher Moore
“It’s sarcasm, Josh.”

“Sarcasm?”

“It’s from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren’t really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.”

“Well, if the village idiot named it, I’m sure it’s a good thing.”

“There you go, you got it.”

“Got what?”

“Sarcasm.”

“No, I meant it.”

“Sure you did.”

“Is that sarcasm?”

“Irony, I think.”

“What’s the difference?”

“I haven’t the slightest idea.”

“So you’re being ironic now, right?”

“No, I really don’t know.”

“Maybe you should ask the idiot.”

“Now you’ve got it.”

“What?”

“Sarcasm.”
Christopher Moore, Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal

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