Eleven

“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
― Elbert Hubbard

“You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well?

It'd go like this: You'd get the boss on the line and say, "Listen, I've been sick ever since I started working here, but today I'm well and I won't be in anymore." Call in well.”
― Tom Robbins

“Just give me a second. Attempting to give a fuck...Attempting harder to give a fuck...Sorry, there was an error; fuck not given.”
― Suzanne Wright, Feral Sins

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde