Mira

“This is always concealed in discussions about surrogacy - that it is not only a desire to raise a child, but also a demand that the mother be absent.”
― Kajsa Ekis Ekman, Being and Being Bought: Prostitution, Surrogacy and the Split Self

“Instead of the vulnerable person (who has now disappeared), the illusion of the invulnerable person is created - the person who, by definition, cannot become a victim. No one - not women, drug abusers, people subjected to human trafficking, people living in poverty, illegal immigrants, or even children with no other option but to dig in the trash for food - can be called 'subjugated.' The ideal of the superman/superwoman becomes the natural condition of the human. For whatever this invulnerable person's fate - to be screwed by multiple men per day, take drugs and contract HIV/AIDs at ten years of age, have her body covered in bruises, lie passively and let herself be used, or turn other children into slaves - she is, by definition, an active subject who exercises opposition and control. The only possible violence that can be exerted against her is by calling her a victim. It is worse than any other physical or psychological violation to speak of her as subjugated - only then does she become a victim.

A consequence of this belief system is the conviction that if there are no victims, there can be no perpetrators. The unmentionables, the men, are completely exonerated in a highly convenient, imperceptible way.”
― Kajsa Ekis Ekman, Being and Being Bought: Prostitution, Surrogacy and the Split Self

“Surrogacy is ongoing for at least nine months, day in and day out. During this time, the woman must abide by a host of restrictions. She is not allowed to exert herself, smoke, drink or take drugs. She must, if the buyers wish, submit to medical tests. Her body goes through numerous changes, she deals with morning sickness, her stomach grows, she can suffer various complaints such as back pain - not to mention the labor and birth itself. She can't escape from any of this; she can't take a break from it for even one minute. She is in it, and it is in her. 'The work' is her very existence, 24/7. For although she lives in symbiosis with the child, she doesn't have the least bit of power over it because the child belongs to someone else. Indian surrogates, it seems, are sometimes not even worthy of knowing what country the child will live in. Surrogacy is thus not something one does, it is something one is: a being who can be bought.”
― Kajsa Ekis Ekman, Being and Being Bought: Prostitution, Surrogacy and the Split Self

“This is what happens when sex becomes work. Because this 'work' isn't something that is produced and walked away from. Instead, the 'work' is one's own Self and body. The consequences are that the body shuts down, becomes numb, and disowns its own functions.”
― Kajsa Ekis Ekman, Being and Being Bought: Prostitution, Surrogacy and the Split Self