Edie

“The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.”
― Dorothy Parker

“Okay. Let's see what we've got." He lifted up her foot and said, "Well, what we've got here is a freakin' boat."

Really?" She slammed her heel against the side of his face, snapping his head to one side. "How big are they now, Mitch?"

Rubbing the abused side of his face, "Dainty little elf feet?"

"Exactly.”
― Shelly Laurenston, The Mane Attraction

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Diggers

“Sissy Mae Smith...stumbled into the room loaded down with even more bags. "You pack like a woman," she snarled when she finally dropped the luggage to the floor. "How can one man have so much conditioner?"

His mouth filled with French toast, Mitch pointed at his hair and snarled, "Tawny mane! Do you think this shit stays this beautiful on its own? It needs care and love! Which is more than I'm getting from you!”
― Shelly Laurenston, The Mane Squeeze