“John, let me make one thing clear,” Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. “Every man is blessed with his gifts from the Lord. One of mine happens to be a penis large enough that, if it had a penis of its own, my penis’ penis would be larger than your penis.”.....
..."Fuck all of you,” John retorted. “You don’t even exist. We’re all just a figment of my cock’s imagination.”
― John Dies at the End
..."Fuck all of you,” John retorted. “You don’t even exist. We’re all just a figment of my cock’s imagination.”
― John Dies at the End
“On the coldest day of winter, I wouldn't give you the steam off my shit”
― City Infernal
― City Infernal
“Sad people are too sad to do anything but drink brandy and sleep all day.”
― Sweet Story
― Sweet Story
“The human eye has to be one of the cruelest tricks nature ever pulled. We can see a tiny, cone-shaped area of light right in front of our faces, restricted to a very narrow band of the electromagnetic spectrum. We can’t see around walls, we can’t see heat or cold, we can’t see electricity or radio signals, we can’t see at a distance. It is a sense so limited that we might as well not have it, yet we have evolved to depend so heavily on it as a species that all other perception has atrophied. We have wound up with the utterly mad and often fatal delusion that if we can’t see something, it doesn’t exist. Virtually all of civilization’s failures can be traced back to that one ominous sentence: ‘I’ll believe it when I see it.’ We can’t even convince the public that global warming is dangerous. Why? Because carbon dioxide happens to be invisible.”
― This Book Is Full of Spiders
― This Book Is Full of Spiders
Bizarro Fiction
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