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James

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James is Currently Reading

James is currently reading

Fear of the Abyss: Healing the Wounds of Shame & Perfectionism

by Aleta Edwards (Goodreads Author)

bookshelves: perfectionism, currently-reading, control, shame, obsessive-compulsive-disorder, anxiety, panic, control-issues, rigidity, black-and-white-thinking, psychoanalysis, fears, unconscious, psychology, self-help

read in January 2013

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James said: " I read this book just recently after listening to this author speak on SOTT's internet radio show. I listened because I really like the hosts and I always like their interviews and discussions, as they're so thought-provoking. But that week's show wa I read this book just recently after listening to this author speak on SOTT's internet radio show. I listened because I really like the hosts and I always like their interviews and discussions, as they're so thought-provoking. But that week's show was different for me from the others. I found I couldn't approach the topic only from my own curiosity as is my custom; it ceased to be a purely intellectual endeavor for me. As a listener, I felt strangely pegged, and had an almost spooky sense that the author knew me as I became wrapped up in the discussion. Her topic in this book, of perfectionism, shame and control all relating to a wounded core pertains to my own feelings so much. I feel she touched on issues in her discussion I'd not regarded through such an acutely sensitive lens in the past. I never liked these things about myself, but I never asked myself where these things came from, or why I felt the way I did.

That next week I reflected on the author's discussion with the show's hosts repeatedly, and so much of what they'd explored together went on replaying in my mind. While I felt drawn to purchase the book, I wondered if it would actually be able to help me. I had tried other approaches in the past, including bouts of entering into therapy myself, and had never found anything close to relief. Finally I decided to purchase her book, and I felt even more of a sense of having been understood than I had done from listening to her speak. I have a feeling that this will only grow with time, and that somehow I've embarked on a journey that will lead to such changes for me, that I might always look back upon that fated internet radio show as a catalyst for change in my life.

I read the book straight through this first time, but I plan to go back and re-read it more slowly now, and engage myself more fully in the exercises. The first time, I read the exercises at the end of each chapter, but I did not yet feel ready to attempt to do these exercises. I know why, I know I felt afraid to look within. But now that I've gone through the whole book and I see that there is nothing to fear at all, I know I am ready for this. The author really helped me to notice that what I think I am afraid of, I am never even going to meet. And now it is safe to embark on whatever changes I would like to make in my life.

I recommend this book and I hope others are able to find it as I did. It is a rare read. ...more "

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(100%)
— Nov 15, 2013 08:18PM

Nov 15, 2013 08:15PM · see review