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Equal Rites
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Craig Ferguson
“Harry Potter, he sends a message on Owl Mail while us poor old muggles have to make do with instantaneous emails and texting. Oh, if only we could be like you Harry Potter, with your four day owl delivery!”
Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson
“For my birthday that year Anne gave me an inflatable atlas globe, along with a birthday card in which she wrote:
I give you the world.
Have fun blowing it up.”
Craig Ferguson, American on Purpose: The Improbable Adventures of an Unlikely Patriot
tags: humor

Craig Ferguson
“From this moment on I'd dedicate my life to rock and roll and take as many drugs as possible. What could possibly go wrong?”
Craig Ferguson, American on Purpose: The Improbable Adventures of an Unlikely Patriot

Craig Ferguson
“Fraser's mother, Janice, was actually quite a happy soul but she had to hide it because, like all pseudo intellectuals, she thought being cheery made her look stupid, which of course she was for believing that rubbish in the first place.

She like to talk about Sartre sometimes, just as insurance.”
Craig Ferguson, Between the Bridge and the River

Craig Ferguson
“Its hard to stay up. Its been a long long day
And you've got the sandman at your door.
But hang on, leave the TV on and lets do it anyway.
Its ok.
You can always sleep through work tomorrow. Ok?
Hey, Hey, Tomorrow's just your future yesterday.
Tell the clock on the wall, "Forget the wake up call."
Cause the night's not nearly through.
Wipe the sleep from your eyes. Give yourself a surprise.
Let your worries wait another day.
And if you stay too late at the bar,
At least you made it out this far.
So make up your mind and say, "Let's do it anyway!"
Its Ok
You can always sleep through work tomorrow, ok?
Hey, Hey, Tomorrow's just your future yesterday.
Life's too short to worry about
the things that you can live without
And I regret to say,
the morning light is hours away.
The world can be such a fright,
But it belongs to us tonight.
What's the point of going to bed?
You look so lovely when your eyes are red.
Tomorrow's just your future yesterday.”
Craig Ferguson

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