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“The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.”
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“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
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“Every good idea sooner or later degenerates into hard work.”
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“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
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“Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”
― The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary
― The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary
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