Donna

“Did I expect him to think sucking my cock was anything other than disgusting? I‟d never even kissed a girl, and believe me, if someone forced me to take part in some below-the-belt mouth-to-vagina action, I think I‟d probably vomit.”
― Cardeno C., Where He Ends and I Begin

“Oh my God, you're like Obnoxious and Annoying had an ass baby!”
― Christopher Moore, Bite Me

“Its a good thing I'm here, big guy, because you have shit taste in friends."

Okay, I said the last part intentionally, knowing how Aaron would react. And right on cue, Aaron said:

"He's not my friend!"

"Well, I guess that settles it, Nick. You're not going to be rebound guy because, despite your predictions of woe, Aaron and I aren't breaking up. I'd say that we'll see you around, but I doubt that'll happen since you don't even rate friend status.”
― Cardeno C., He Completes Me

“FYI, when I type WTF, you are supposed to read What the Fuck? Same with OMG, and OMFG, which are Oh My God and Oh My Fucking God. Only a completely lame Disney Channel nimnode pronounces the letters.”
― Christopher Moore, Bite Me