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“Ayden saw me and his body slumped. “Oh, thank God.” “Please,” Matthias said. “I told you she’s too hard to kill.” “Aww,” I said. “Thank you.” Matthias offered me a sweet smile. “Just like a cockroach.” ”
― Demons in Disguise
― Demons in Disguise

“Nuh-uh.” Blake shook his head. “Nothing gets trapped in my brain.” No one argued.”
― Demons in Disguise
― Demons in Disguise

“On Yard Work
"What are you doing with that rake?... No, that is not raking.... What? Different styles of raking? No there is one style, and then there is bullshit. Guess which one you're doing.”
― Sh*t My Dad Says
"What are you doing with that rake?... No, that is not raking.... What? Different styles of raking? No there is one style, and then there is bullshit. Guess which one you're doing.”
― Sh*t My Dad Says

“On Chivalry “Give your mother the front seat…. I don’t give a shit if she said you could have it, that’s what she’s supposed to do, and you’re supposed to say, ‘No, I insist.’ You think I’m gonna drive around with my wife in the backseat and a nine-year-old in the front? You’re a crazy son of a bitch.”
― Sh*t My Dad Says
― Sh*t My Dad Says

“On Packing My Own Lunch
You have to pack a sandwich. It can't just be cookies and bullshit....No, I said if you packed it yourself, you could pack it how you want it, not pack it like a moron.”
― Sh*t My Dad Says
You have to pack a sandwich. It can't just be cookies and bullshit....No, I said if you packed it yourself, you could pack it how you want it, not pack it like a moron.”
― Sh*t My Dad Says
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