Prism

“On Chivalry “Give your mother the front seat…. I don’t give a shit if she said you could have it, that’s what she’s supposed to do, and you’re supposed to say, ‘No, I insist.’ You think I’m gonna drive around with my wife in the backseat and a nine-year-old in the front? You’re a crazy son of a bitch.”
― Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

“Nuh-uh.” Blake shook his head. “Nothing gets trapped in my brain.” No one argued.”
― A&E Kirk, Demons in Disguise

“On Yard Work
"What are you doing with that rake?... No, that is not raking.... What? Different styles of raking? No there is one style, and then there is bullshit. Guess which one you're doing.”
― Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

“Oh, my God! Why are you in a towel?” Ayden sprang forward and ripped off his leather jacket. He led us both in an awkward sidestep to my closet. “Take your time. Get clothes on. Lots of them.”
He shoved me inside and closed the door. In the pitch, dark I reached for the light switch, but the door opened again. “Sorry.” Ayden’s hand slid in, groping for the switch, found it, and flipped it on. “Don’t come out until… lots and lots of clothes.”
― A&E Kirk, Drop Dead Demons