Stephanie Elkins

“How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.”
― Janet Evanovich, High Five

“Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.”
― Janet Evanovich

“Everyone knows you can't see death cooties. Take my word for it, that couch has the biggest, fattest death cooties that ever existed. That couch has the mother of all death cooties. – Lula ”
― Janet Evanovich

“I'd bitch slap the devil for you.”
― Janet Evanovich