Danielle Eisner

“There should be one line at every store for people who have their shit together. —TRUE FACT”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

“On a scale of one to stepping on a LEGO, how much pain are you in?”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

“Carson," she said when she picked up. I liked it. Clear. Concise. To the point.
I decided to try it myself. "Davidson."
A loud sigh filtered to me. "Charley, you called me. You can't just say Davidson."
"What are you, the phone greeting police?”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

“You can't trust anything on the Internet."
"Can, too," I said, completed offended.
"So, if I posted a comment saying I was an Arabian prince from Milwaukee?"
"Yeah, but you're a big fat liar. You don't count. I mean, look at your dad. Pathological liar numeral uno. Lying is in your genes."
He leaned forward. There's only one thing in my jeans right now.”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge