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“Even what passes as heterosexual intimacy is often resented by straight women who find themselves doing the emotional heavy lifting for men who have no close friends and won’t go to therapy. Men are less likely than women to discuss mental health with friends and family, to seek out psychotherapy, or to recognize they are depressed—a pattern so common as to be termed “normative male alexithymia” by psychologists.51 For straight men in relationships, all of these needs get aimed at women partners. In 2016, the writer Erin Rodgers coined the term “emotional gold digger” to describe straight men’s reliance on women partners to “play best friend, lover, career advisor, stylist, social secretary, emotional cheerleader, mom.”52 Elaborating on this dynamic and the emotional burnout it produces in straight women, Melanie Hamlett further explains that the concept of the emotional gold digger “has gained more traction recently as women, feeling increasingly burdened by unpaid emotional labor, have wised up to the toll of toxic masculinity, which keeps men isolated and incapable of leaning on each other. . . . While [women] read countless self-help books, listen to podcasts, seek out career advisors, turn to female friends for advice and support, or spend a small fortune on therapists to deal with old wounds and current problems, the men in their lives simply rely on them.”
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
“First, queer feminists have argued that straight life is characterized by the inescapable influence of sexism and toxic masculinity, both of which are either praised or passively tolerated in straight spaces. Second, queer observers of straight life have pointed to straight women’s endless and ineffective efforts to repair straight men and the pain of witnessing straight women’s optimism and disappointment.”
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
“...so many boys and men value other men's approval more than women's humanity, continuing a centuries-old tradition of positioning bros before hoes and using control over women's bodies to earn male respect... and to reroute their disavowed desire for one another through a more socially acceptable object.”
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
― The Tragedy of Heterosexuality
“This can be said about shame: those who experience it feel that anything can happen to them, that the shame will never cease and that it will only be followed by more shame.”
― Shame
― Shame
“In my dream I apologize to everyone I meet. Instead of introducing myself, I apologize for not knowing why I am alive. I am sorry. I am sorry. I apologize. In real life, oddly enough, when I am fully awake and out and about, if I catch someone’s eye, I quickly look away. Perhaps this too is a form of apology. Perhaps this is the form apologies take in real life. In real life the looking away is the apology, despite the fact that when I look away I almost always feel guilty; I do not feel as if I have apologized. Instead I feel as if I have created a reason to apologize, I feel the guilt of having ignored that thing—the encounter. I could have nodded, I could have smiled without showing my teeth. In some small way I could have wordlessly said, I see you seeing me and I apologize for not knowing why I am alive. I am sorry. I am sorry. I apologize. Afterwards, after I have looked away, I never feel as if I can say, Look, look at me again so that I can see you, so that I can acknowledge that I have seen you, so that I can see you and apologize.”
― Don’t Let Me Be Lonely: An American Lyric
― Don’t Let Me Be Lonely: An American Lyric
Hội Thích Đọc Sách
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— last activity May 10, 2026 11:44PM
Hãy chia sẻ và lan toả tình yêu của mình với sách
A Reading Club for Vietnamese
— 1911 members
— last activity Jul 29, 2024 08:42AM
This is a public reading club intended for Vietnamese readers. Vietnamese is the primary language used for discussion or book recommendation, but En ...more
GT’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at GT’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
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