Leanne

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Leanne is Currently Reading

Leanne is currently reading

Heaven Official's Blessing: Tian Guan Ci Fu (Novel) Vol. 4

by Mò Xiāng Tóng Xiù

bookshelves: adult-fiction, fantasy, owned, queer, danmei, wuxia, xianxia, currently-reading

Reading for the 2nd time

read in October 2023

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Leanne said: " With four more books to go, I have no idea what's going to happen next. All I can hope for is these boys finally sit down and freaking talk about their feelings because this books' cover was a freaking tease. I wanted sexy kisses and instead I got TR With four more books to go, I have no idea what's going to happen next. All I can hope for is these boys finally sit down and freaking talk about their feelings because this books' cover was a freaking tease. I wanted sexy kisses and instead I got TRAUMA and PAIN. (and it was beautiful)

--

"That person saw me at my worst," Hua Cheng said.
"Then I'm very envious of that," Xie Lian replied.
Hearing him say so, Hua Cheng gazed over.
Xie Lian stopped eating and said gently, "But I can sort of understand... your feelings." After a pause, he continued, "There was a period in my own life that wasn't easy. Back then, I'd always think about how wonderful it would be if someone could still love me for who I was, even if they saw me rolling in the dirt and couldn't get up. Though I don't know if there's anyone out there like that. And I'm scared of showing that part of myself too...
"But if it's someone San Lang yearns for...I think that even if they saw you at their worst, they wouldn't say something like, 'ah, you're not so great after all.'"
His face grew solemn.
"To me, the one basking in infinite glory is you; the one fallen from grace is also you. What matters is you, not the state of you.
"I... admire San Lang very much. I want to understand your everything, so I'm very envious that someone has already met that version of you so early on. That kind of affinity can only come by chance; it can't be begged for."
(Ch 63.)

This passage hit me like a freight train. Identity is such a core theme within this series. I cannot even put into words how touching, heartbreaking, and to some extent devastating this scene was. When gods and ghosts can change their bodies and their forms so easily to serve their own purposes; when their humanity is removed in favor of power and fury and fear... at what point do they lose themselves? There's another passage (which I failed to bookmark) that says something along the lines of "Gods were human, and ghosts were human. At the end of the day, we are all just that: human."

The gods have flaws, just as the ghosts have virtues. Perhaps none of this is a question of good vs. evil but rather intent and the mitigation (or causation) of consequences. Means and ends...

So good. 5/5, let's keep going! ...more "

progress:

(page 303 of 419)
"Had a long discussion with my partner last night about how understanding the core drive of a character informs the reasons behind every single choice they make. Xie Lian cannot NOT help people. He can't stay out of others' affairs, despite every warning, because he is just that helpful and selfless and he is CONSTANTLY in trouble for it. Why? Same reason WWX can't keep his mouth shut. It's who he is. He can't help it" — Oct 04, 2023 09:16AM

Oct 05, 2023 12:27PM · see review