Laureen

“I’m only marginally qualified to be giving advice at all. My body mass index is certainly not ideal, I frequently use my debit card to buy things that cost less than three dollars because I never have cash on me, and my bedroom is so untidy it looks like vandals ransacked the Anthropologie Sale section. I’m kind of a mess.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“Even in my revenge fantasy where all I do is exercise, I can still do only twenty-five pull-ups. Pull-ups are tough, no joke.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“And how shall I think of you?' He considered a moment and then laughed. 'Think of me with my nose in a book!”
― Susanna Clarke, Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell

“So the captain, the first officer and the ship's doctor and sometimes the engineer all beam down to a planet. Together."
"The entire complement of the senior officers?"
Billy nodded
"And who has the command of the ship?"
"I don't know. Junior officers I guess."
"If they worked for me I would have them court-martialed. That sounds like a dereliction of duty."
"I know. I know. I always thought it odd myself. But that's not the point."
"What is the point?"
"They're usually accompanied by a guy in the red shirt. Always a crew member you've never seen before. And as soon as you see the shirt, you know he's going to die.”
― Michael Scott, The Enchantress