Sonja Nelson

“CUSTOMER: I read a book in the sixties. I don’t remember the author, or the title. But it was green, and it made me laugh. Do you know which one I mean?”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“CUSTOMER: These books are really stupid, aren’t they?
BOOKSELLER: Which ones?
CUSTOMER: You know, the ones where animals like cats and mice are best friends.
BOOKSELLER: I suppose they’re not very realistic, but then that’s fiction.
CUSTOMER: They’re more than unrealistic; they’re really stupid.
BOOKSELLER: Well, writers use that kind of thing to teach kids about accepting people different to themselves, you know?
CUSTOMER: Yeah, well, books shouldn’t pretend that different people get on like that and that everything is ‘la de da’ and wonderful, should they? Kids should learn that life’s a bitch, and the sooner the better.”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“CUSTOMER: Oh, look, these books are all signed. (Pause) I wonder who signed them ?”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops

“CUSTOMER: OK, so you want this book?
THEIR DAUGHTER: Yes!
CUSTOMER: Peter Pan?
THEIR DAUGHTER: Yes, please. Because he can fly.
CUSTOMER: Yes, he can - he's very good at flying.
THEIR DAUGHTER: Why can't I fly, daddy?
CUSTOMER: Because of evolution, sweetheart.”
― Jen Campbell, Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops