Nuno Roso

“Nodding is a great way to inspire agreement. Most people make the mistake of hiding or stifling their feelings in meetings or interactions. If you agree with something, show it. Here is another weird effect of nodding: When you nod yes, you get the other person to speak more … 67 percent more. Researchers observed applicants interviewing for civil service positions. They found that when the interviewer nodded, the duration of interviewees’ speech increased by 67 percent.”
― Vanessa Van Edwards, Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication

“One audience member, Bob, was my vocal lifeline. Bob is very vocally expressive and has this wonderful habit of murmuring “Mmm” to himself whenever he feels inspired or interested. Whether he realized it or not, every few minutes he would “Mmm” me with encouragement. When I surprised him with a study or new fact, he would audibly say, “Aha!” in the otherwise silent soundstage. It gave me more confidence. He’s also an authentically loud laugher—cueing others to laugh heartily along with the awkward jokes that I like to share while teaching. From my spot onstage, I could hear his subtle vocal encouragement every time I shared a good point. His vocal invitations were gifts to me as a teacher. It was as if he was tossing me little vocal snacks from the audience, giving me energy to keep going and keep at it. Most important, these vocal invitations were encouraging for other students! I noticed when he said, “Aha!” other students would look up from their notes and nod. When he laughed, they laughed. Vocal invitations create warmth for everyone.”
― Vanessa Van Edwards, Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication

“WARMTH CUE #2: Nod to Know”
― Vanessa Van Edwards, Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication

“Most people make the mistake of not looking too excited when negotiating for something they want. This actually works against you! Using nonverbal warmth and competence both builds rapport with your negotiator and helps them respect you—which might get you a better deal. Researchers even found that nonverbal ambivalence (trying to be neutral) hurts your ability to negotiate.33 They found that showing nonverbal signs of disappointment when you hear a bad offer can actually cause the person you’re negotiating with to make larger concessions. This is a more authentic way to negotiate—why hide your excitement or stifle your upset? Show it all! Highlight your true feelings. When you hear something that you don’t like or don’t agree with, switch to your Danger Zone cues. This is a nonconfrontational yet clear way to show disappointment and get the other person to make concessions without having to say a word. They offer you a bad price: you lip purse. They offer an unworkable timeline: you furrow your brow and cross your arms. They don’t give you what you need: you shake your head no and turn away. These are subtle nonverbal ways of saying, No thanks. Can you do any better?”
― Vanessa Van Edwards, Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication