Lauren

“Someday I intend to read all those books I've written.”
― Dan Quayle

“Sometimes, a word succeeds beyond the wildest dreams of its creators, like a virus sent into the world to infect common speech.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Eyre Affair

“You nearly killed eight people!" I managed to gasp out loud.
"My count was closer to twelve," returned Havisham as she opened the door. "And anyhow, you can't nearly kill someone. Either they are dead or they are not.”
― Jasper Fforde, Lost in a Good Book

“I think that you could have used your vast intellect far more usefully by serving mankind instead of stealing it. -Mycroft
"Where's the fun in that? Goodness is weakness, pleasantness is poisonous, serenity is mediocrity and kindness is for losers. The best reason for committing Loathsome and detestable acts - and let's face it, I am considered something of an expert in this field - is purely for their own sake. Monetary gain is all very well, but it dilutes the taste of wickedness to a lower level that is obtainable by almost anyone with an overdeveloped sense of avarice. True and baseless evil is as rare as the purest good." -Acheron”
― Jasper Fforde, The Eyre Affair