Juliette's Chronicles

“I just want to clarify that I don't mean 'without my vagina' like I didn't have it with me at the time. I just mean that I wasn't, you know...displaying it while I was at Starbucks. That's probably understood, but I thought I should clarify, since it's the first chapter and you don't know that much about me. So just to clarify, I always have my vagina with me. It's like my American Express card. (In that I don't leave home without it. Not that I use it to buy stuff with.)”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

“When you find someone you want to spend forever with you, you don't let them go, whether forever turns out to be a day or a year of fifty years. Don't let the fear of losing them keep you from loving them.”
― Nicole Williams, Crash

“I wanted to kill someone and I wanted to die and I wanted to run as far and as fast as I could because she was never coming back. She had fallen off the face of the earth and she was never coming back.”
― Melissa Kantor, Maybe One Day

“Knock-knock, motherfucker.”
― Jenny Lawson, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir