“A phenomenon that a number of people have noted while in deep depression is the sense of being accompanied by a second self — a wraithlike observer who, not sharing the dementia of his double, is able to watch with dispassionate curiosity as his companion struggles against the oncoming disaster, or decides to embrace it. There is a theatrical quality about all this, and during the next several days, as I went about stolidly preparing for extinction, I couldn't shake off a sense of melodrama — a melodrama in which I, the victim-to-be of self-murder, was both the solitary actor and lone member of the audience.”
― Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness
― Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness
“I don't want to hurt you or anybody so please forget about me. Just try. Find yourself a better friend.”
― Hold Still
― Hold Still
“You were said to have died of suffering. But there was not
as much sadness in you as there is now in those who
remember you. You died because you searched for
happiness at the risk of finding the void.”
― Suicide
as much sadness in you as there is now in those who
remember you. You died because you searched for
happiness at the risk of finding the void.”
― Suicide
“Suicide. It's something I've been thinking about. Not too seriously, but I have been thinking about it.”
That's the note. Word for word. And I know it's word for word because I wrote it dozens of times before delivering it. I'd write it, throw it away, write it, crumple it up, throw it away.
But why was I writing it to begin with? I asked myself that question every time I printed the words onto a new sheet of paper. Why was I writing this note? It was a lie. I hadn't been thinking about it. Not really. Not in detail. The thought would come into my head and I'd push it away.
But I pushed it away a lot.”
― Thirteen Reasons Why
That's the note. Word for word. And I know it's word for word because I wrote it dozens of times before delivering it. I'd write it, throw it away, write it, crumple it up, throw it away.
But why was I writing it to begin with? I asked myself that question every time I printed the words onto a new sheet of paper. Why was I writing this note? It was a lie. I hadn't been thinking about it. Not really. Not in detail. The thought would come into my head and I'd push it away.
But I pushed it away a lot.”
― Thirteen Reasons Why
“Depression isn't a war you win. It's a battle you fight every day. You never stop, never get to rest. It's one bloody fray after another.”
― We Are the Ants
― We Are the Ants
Tonicky’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Tonicky’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
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