Holly

“He had a new girl, and I told him she looked like Marilyn Monroe. He smiled because he thought I meant she was beautiful, and I smiled because I meant she looked like a corpse.”
― Jarod Kintz, The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.

“I cut an inch off of every straw I see, just to make the world suck a little less.
”
― Jarod Kintz, This Book Has No Title

“Instead of a Lemonade Stand, I should open up a “You know what I can’t stand?” Stand. I’ll sell rants in small, medium, and large.”
― Jarod Kintz, This Book Title is Invisible

“Love knows no boundaries. I wish I would have known that before I hired a cartographer to map out my romantic territory.”
― Jarod Kintz, The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.