Ian

“Before starting work on being more mature it’s worth being aware that it’s possible to achieve a fake kind of maturity in relationships. All of us have some degree of pretend maturity in our repartee of relating. We’re prone to doing a patch-up job on the immaturity blocks we inherit from the generations of our families’ anxious sensitivities so that they’re hidden from view as much as possible. Any patching up we do can make us look pretty impressive at times as we switch on our most confident persona. This counterfeit type of maturity is not always unhelpful as it enables us to rise to many challenges in life and cope beyond our usual capacities. This “winging it” kind of maturity can be an adaptive advantage, but it can also be a bit of a trap in giving us an inflated view of our maturity.1”
― Jim Herrington, The Leader's Journey: Accepting the Call to Personal and Congregational Transformation