

“You is kind. You is smart. You is important.”
― The Help
― The Help
“Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You” was constantly on my FM Walkman radio around that time. I think that made me cry because I associated it with absolutely no one.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue. In what other profession would you brag about not knowing stuff? “I’m not one of those fancy Harvard heart surgeons. I’m just an unlicensed plumber with a dream and I’d like to cut your chest open.” The crowd cheers.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants
“You could put a blond wig on a hot-water heater and some dude would try to fuck it.”
― Bossypants
― Bossypants

MISSION: Read books 1-6 before Movie 5 comes out on July 13th! RULES: Contest begins Memorial Day, May 28th. No audiobooks allowed! Paper-versions onl ...more
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