Presley

“You worry too much. Eat some bacon...What? No, I got no idea if it'll make you feel better. I just made too much bacon.”
― Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

“If you work hard and study hard. And you fuck up. That's okay. If you fuck up and you fuck up, then you're a fuckup”
― Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

“A well-known scientist (some say it was Bertrand Russell) once gave a public lecture on astronomy. He described how the earth orbits around the sun and how the sun, in turn, orbits around the center of a vast collection of stars called our galaxy. At the end of the lecture, a little old lady at the back of the room got up and said: “What you have told us is rubbish. The world is really a flat plate supported on the back of a giant tortoise.” The scientist gave a superior smile before replying, “What is the tortoise standing on?” “You’re very clever, young man, very clever,” said the old lady. “But it’s turtles all the way down!”
― Stephen Hawking, A Brief History of Time

“I just want silence... Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more.”
― Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says