shyam(most of the time not online)

“A screwdriver hops into a taxi cab and says to the driver, "Screw you! ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦”
― Various, 101 Dirty Jokes - sexual and adult's jokes

“A little boy and his friends are being called bastards and bitches by bullies at school. The boy goes home and asks, "Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" And his dad replies, "Bitches are ladies and bastards are gentlemen." Then the boy goes upstairs to see his mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally drops a perfume bottle, and his mom says, "Shit!" "Mom, what is shit?" and she says, "Perfume." So he goes to see his dad (who is carving a chicken), and his dad cuts himself and yells, "Fuck!" The boy asks, "Dad, what does fuck mean?" and dad says "preparing." Then he follows his dad upstairs. A few minutes later his mom and dad are about to have sex when his dad says, "Where are the condoms?" The little boy asks, "What are condoms?" and his father says, "Condoms are coats and jackets." The following night his father invites over some important business clients. The boy opens the door for them and says, "Hello! Please come in, Bastards and bitches. Hang your condoms up here, my mom is upstairs rubbing shit on her face and my dad is downstairs fucking the chicken.”
― Various, 101 Dirty Jokes - sexual and adult's jokes

“if we don’t do it, nothing will change. We will continue living our normal, repetitive, ordinary lives forever.”
― Mark Mulle, The Fearless Snow Golem's Diaries (Book 1): The Edge (An Unofficial Minecraft Book for Kids Ages 9 - 12

“We have traveled a long way in search of a witch to help us. Villagers are sick and need potions. Witches near our home are missing. Please do not be afraid. We will return in the morning. The South Meadow Villagers.”
― Mark Mulle, Steve's New Neighbors: The Wither Skeleton King (Book 4): Finding a Cure (An Unofficial Minecraft Diary Book for Kids Ages 9 - 12